Wednesday, August 13, 2014

TMI TMI TMI Too Much Information...I know.

Due to the recent and shitty death of Robin Williams, today we are going to talk about a first world and third world problem in which I am currently embroiled in (This is a distraction from the RW Grief you are feeling). I generally joke about this a lot so it kind of feels like I am deservedly suffering from it - Scat Karma, of sorts.

The sad truth is ::SOB:: I have been plagued with the trots for 5 complete and full fucking days. I think it is safe to say, in Canada, the trots last generally a day or 2 tops when you get a bug (as opposed to the lifelong trots some ppl have in third world countries b/c their water is full of grossness) but oh no....this nightmare of unscheduled and extremely urgent poo has been going strong for 5 damn days. 

At first I was sure it was just my phantom gallbladder crap (pardon the pun) - but now I am not so sure.
This brown veil of cramping death could be a stomach bug but JFC - this seems excessive. No one else I know has this and no one I have been around lately is plagued...(or perhaps they have some class and just don't blog about it?)

I was a total jackass today and went to work, where I spent a good portion of the day earnestly taking the elevator from the 5th floor to the 2nd floor where there is an unshared handicapped washroom (So much for anti-shit-your-pants pills working). I have never wanted to beat the fuck out of a slow elevator so badly in all my life...and I dare ANYONE to call me out for using that washroom. So really - 4 trips to the can on another floor in the span of 3 hours is fairly legit sickness in my humble opinion. This is NOT the ideal way to be productive at work and the shakes and weakness combined make the whole martyrdom work experience rather....shitty stupid.

I have this irrational thought about my inner guts since my gallbladder was removed... whenever I feel a cramp (it is always up where your GB is if you have one, so where mine WAS) or anything "off" I am convinced that the clamps on my cystic bile ducts are not right and I have a bile leak and am slowly dying. Awesome. Though after just doing some reading I see it is a real thing (though rare) so maybe I am not so paranoid after all! Postoperative Cystic Duct Stump Leaks (CDSL)

Or maybe I just have a stomach bug and should just carry on trying not to shit my pants during urgent elevator rides at work...? And quit talking about it....Uh-huh...

1 comment:

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Holy shit! Five days does seem excessive. I hope you have firmed up since then.