adoration

Was a fantastic movie...TRAILER HERE
I love it when Canadian movies aren't sucky...

And I saw Away We Go today...was funny...could wait to be rented though...

Have started a new Douglas Coupland book ~Elenor Rigby~ so far so good...I think he may be a favorite of mine...if I read a 3rd I like then I will dedicate myself to reading all his books...
I should write a book...I mean there are plenty of writers out there writing in a style in which I identify with so what's so far fetched about my grindy, in your face style appealing to a portion of the population...? IVE HEARD OF WEIRDER SHIT.
I have often pondered the idea of writing a book...whether it would be fiction or just stories of things that have gone on...or a mixture of both...or whatever really...I dunno.

Believe it or not...I have a lot f shit to say and don't really care who is interested in it or not (hence this blog haha)...things I never say out loud but they scream to be heard...things like...my earliest memory...I must have been 3ish...I know it is genuine and not fabricated by my mind from photographs...I am laying as a small child on my grandmothers bed and looking at her tick clock ticking away, the smell of Absorbine Jr heavy in the air, the Absorbine Jr bottle right beside the tick tock clock...I can still hear the clock...and smell the odors of that moment...

I like to think I have the same bottle in my possession (but it may not be, that would make it 40 yrs old)...I nabbed a very old glass bottle of Absorbine Jr out of my grandparents medicine cabinet before they died a billion years ago....it looks antique...there's still a little bit left in it...and every so often I get it out to open and inhale...and it takes me back to that comfortable place...
before my mother married a myriad of men who were not all that fond of me...before my own mind took a turn...before the agonizing weight of true loss settled on my shoulders...
To this day I love the smell of it...
When I was little my grandmother was my be all end all...I loved her so intensely I didn't know what to do with it all when she visited us...I lived with her and my Grandfather (my mom and Aunty Cathy and Aunty Pam as well) until I was around 3...after that whenever my Grandparents came to visit I was OVER THE MOON that my "Nanny" was there...she had a very lovely side to her then...I never forgot how she made me feel as a little kid...even when she was old and mean and nasty to all of us later in her life...I think that carried a lot of us through her elder years...