Yaaaa Hooooooo

9 days of freeeeedommmmmmmmmmmm!!! <--like Braveheart

fuck im so happy...
even though im royally irritated I get no englishman tonight im looking on the brightside and am just glad im work-free for the duration...
i will eat perogies with sour cream and ketchup instead...and watch a movie...or read...or do whatever the fuck i want just b/c i can!

this bldg must be full of fellow nerds b/c the laundry room is fucking LOADED with clothes...on a friday night.
i get a boner thinking about having my own washer and drier again.....and a garborator (sp)...fuck i loved that thing.

moving onnnn....

"Why I Am an Idiot" by Jennifer C___

I am an idiot b/c I leave myself 20 mins to get ready 4 work when i already told myself when I got up I wasnt going to do that b/c I hate going to work looking like i put my make up on while on a rollercoaster.

I am an idiot b/c I bit my nails while watching survivor and now im pissed off that tv makes me bite my nails unless im stuffing my face with food.

I am an idiot b/c I don't have a dvd burner to back my shit up with and now im bitter.

I am an idiot b/cI have not done laundry in 11 days and all my clothes are dirty so I must go to work looking like i just crawled out of my coffin.

THE END

PS....day 11...I dont care what happens at work for 9 days after today...I will not CALL work! i will not CALL WORK!!!!!!!!!! N ONNNN OOO NONONOOOOOOOOOOOO

one more day to live through

day 10 folks...that means ONE MORE DAY and im free for 9 woooohooooooo
day 11 is sure to be a killer...as its the 15th and a friday (dbl payday)...its also the last day I have b4 i go so all hell is sure to break loose.
fuck it though...
we got auditted today and i nearly barfed...i also did my 1st interview today and i think we will be giving the gal an offer...may backfire, who knows...

tonight survivor was ok...Ozzy the Latino is hot...but I think the concept is a little too faded now...unless i get really sucked in i wont be shitting my pants if i miss an episode.
the roller grrl who let the chickens go is a dick hahaha hahaha

I picked my knee scab really good tonight and bled all over myself and ayla looked at me like i was a retard. Sometimes she should be the mom.

im drinking coffee...and going to bed soon to read...the Bell Jar is freaking my mind out...the end is just fucking full of fuckery.

my sister kim reminded me of the bowls i used to make out of vinyl records....now i wanna make some!!!! she wondered of u could melt a cd the same way...i dunno...anyone ever tried it?

i dunno where the englishman is...what i do know is hes had all week off and ive seen him once and this irritates me yet i will never admit it to him...it just seems like a waste of good ol opportunity...unless of course my gibbledness freaks him the fuck out...

whatever.

im getting a haircut saturday and my whole life with change as u all know so.... ha ha ha

im now scared to have the mary kay broad over...even though i know theres no chance in hell id get rooked into anything...

OHMYJESUSFUCKINGCHRISTOFALLCHRISTS

not only was Ryan McMahon fanfuckingtastic tonight...guess who else was there JUST BY CHANCE....no not matt good....but neil from 54-40...no shit...apparently hes buds with coco love alcorn and he played 2 54-40 tunes with her all acoustic and lovely and it was fucking AMAZING to see.
Margaret and I were awed by such a chance piece of coolness...the rest of the young'uns didnt quite get it i dont think...but man how cool....

better than an autograph: KELLEE!!!!!

big balls...loofa and trivia challenges

so last ngiht i started blathering on only 4 it to vanish so by then i was too tired to repsot it all so...consider yourself blessed.

night b4 last was cool...the englishman came over and despite me being drained of all my life force due to the day of manager meeting horridness it was cool...he and i have a rapport now...we are delightfully retarded and have a pretty good time bullshitting and such. It turned into TRIVIA night....the topic of BIG BALLS came up....of course its an AC/DC song but he was convinced it was Mott the Hoople...I googled his ass incorrect...then he kicked my ass on the topic of LOOFA...yeah i always thought they were underwater plant/growth things...nope..theyre GOURDS that grow on land...so we were tied.

Oh i won a Mary Kay home party make up session with 5 girlfriends hahahah isnt that the best news EVER! hahah hahaha haha ive avoided this lady for 3 mths but i finally decided to make her come over and gimme my 30.00 of product and then service me and 5 of my friends...which will end up being ayla and her friends b/c i dunno one person who would show up at my house 4 such an event...its up there with Tupperware Parties. yikes.
Maybe Margaret D. will come over if I tell her there is beer. ha!

Tonight is Ryan McMahon woohoooo!!!! Im dragging LOTSA ppl there tonight from work so it should make 4 an interesting evening...ill be sober as a mofo sadly but...oh well.
I have been directed to make sure i get an autograph 4 Kellee
hahahaha yeah he will look at me like im a fucktard (since its been a few yrs of knowing him and ive never asked 4 one yet b/c its kinda goofy haha) so ill be sure to tell him it isnt actually FOR ME lol

here...

best walmart purchase ever

ok ABOVE is the coolest candle ever I spotted it at walmart and for only $2.97 I was the proud owner of my own jesus candle complete with creepy prayer on the back and everything.
Dont act like u arent jealous of it.

Im stoned.
Tomorrow is a manager meeting. Long, drawn out meetings that make me want to cut ppls lips off.
I have my PR plan almost ready to go...I have a ride TO the ferry and it sounds like I have a ride home as well now so that worked out decent.

Tomorrow is 9/11I am sure I should be far more disturbed but...now im just a paranoid schitzophrenic about the whole topic...theres way too much bullshit to sift through to make any sense of it all...and it bugs the shit outta me that so many ppl are horrified about 9/11 when that shit happens daily in other places...ppl live with the threat of death and violence and terror daily but ooooo we are so wrapped up in our own crap we dont care.Not to say the 9/11 dead werent important, of course they were/are...but how do u score importance when it comes to human lives?It was shocking to watch...I remember it vividly...me telling my then loser boyfriend steve that it wasnt fucking funny b/c that bldg was FULL of ppl....and then hanging up on him. ha fuck he was a dick.

i want the englishman to come over. i feel snuggly.

hahahahah the other day i made up a new word...i was trying to speak but sometimes thats hard work 4 me and i was trying to say scottish but i was thinking english and i said SCOTTLISH...ha ha ha its my new fav. word.Say it out loud....itll be your fav. word too!

my mom called me tonight...havent talked to her in a few mths...conversations with her are always the same...i listen to her talk about her job for 1.5 hrs...
gawd help me.

man a week or so ago the hot bike guy next door was humping his GF and she was screaming through the hallways like nobodies business....she was DIGGING it...he looks like a foxy lover boy alright...i havent seen him since then but next time i do ill probably wet myself.

I bought this today (ABOVE)....is it a VASE...or a big glass....??? I bought it thinking it was a giant glass...and i love green glass...but then the sales lady said it was a lovely vase and i was like, whatever bitch....but now ayla says its a vase...i dont care im still gunna drink out of it. ha h ahah h hahahahh haa

cry me a river of coffee & nicotine...

no T3's today...thats the plan.
Should make my new hire nice and ON EDGE dontcha think? haha haha hahaha hahaha

im drinking a coffee right now trying to figure out why i dont feel more grown up 4 doing so.
i always though if i smoked or drank coffee id be a grown up...and here im not after all. fuck

it rained all night so this makes me happy...it smells good outside.

my bread was moldy so no toast 4 me. rats.

michelle and i did some cool emailing last night b4 i lapsed into a coma...shes making my dream of having a fridge with an ice dispenser all the more important to me hahahahaha

i am still feeling non-inclined to talk to Connie...its been many months...ill probably call her in Nov 4 her bday...it feels really weird coming to the conclusion that an amazing friendship may have just run its course...i feel uber immature, like *ohhh if yer gunna be with him im not yer friend anymore* but its so much more than that to me...im sure he is a lovely person but the fact remains he beat her up and hurt her to the point she aborted the baby she was having with him and left him only to go back a few mths later....wtf was the gawd damn point of it all. it sickens me.
blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it still pisses me off to the point where i cant even think about talking to her w/o feeling aggressive.

7 shifts to get through then its 9 days of vacation. havent sorted out how im getting to courtenay to the ferry yet but...im being spontaneous i guess...haha

I guess I have a cold and have been too stoned to notice this week until now. ha ha ha ha

doodle-meister

**i stole this off someones blog but now i forget who so whoever u are im sorry but it was so humorous i couldnt help myself**

u know sometimes i will out of the blue realize im clenching my jaw so tight i have to force myself to relax....wtf is that...? subconcious stress or what?

now that i outted myself about my JT fetish I feel dirty and bad and need to be spanked.

celeb observations:

*shakira bugs me now....i used to like looking at her, now i dont.
*why is nicole kidmans face so shiney? it looks stupid
*tom & katies kid has a shit load of hair
*what happened to jude law?
*matt goodness is in the UK....i hope he doesnt get a tapeworm on his travels
*i thought the ONE NIGHT IN PARIS title for the lame paris hilton sex tape was clever (erika dont call me paris again)

anyhoo....i wrote 3 letters last night...i was in a doodly/writing mood...
new girl starts tomorrow at work....gawd help me if shes a stick in the mud its gunna be horrid...i cant stand working with ppl i dont like...im kinda selfish that way. if i gotta spend 8 hrs a day with someone i wanna at least like them somewhat.
ok my arm is dead now.
oh b4 i go know what ive been watching lately? FAME the series...HAHAHAHAHHA omfg its badddddddddddddddddd

u know yer old when...

...u find justin timberlake 100% fuckable and love his new song.

hooch tablets...coffee & jesus pens

it amazes me that AVON makes enough money to keep making their crap products to sell....

kelly got me drinking coffee...i am currently making myself a cup of coffee...i am not a coffee drinker but that damn french vanilla creamer crap makes coffee taste somewhat decent. It is likely a phase but man id feel like a grown up if i started drinking coffee fulltime...haha shit maybe ill start smoking too...j/k...if i was gunna become a smoker id pick crack. It looks more fun and its probably cheaper than buying cigarettes in canada.

my dreams lately have become even more fucked up than usual...i blame the drugs. I mean in one i loaded my hooch up like a pez dispenser with large fruits dissolvable vitamins and spent the whole dream periodically checking to see if they were dissolving....WTF is THAT? *shakes head*

Ayla's awake...shes been assigned regular duties...shes in charge of putting all clean dishes away...tidying the house daily and if she leaves her wet towels on the floor or her bed im only letting her dry off with face cloths...it drives me mad which is why im sure she does it...ive tried ignoring it and pretending i dont care but then i end up picking it up b/c she never will on her own hahaha brat

Laura, I used the dragonfly paper you gave me with the matching pen and the pen is now MY FAVORITEST PEN EVER!!!! ooo its a cheap crap pen but it has the perfect INK and thinkness and everything...wooohoooo I love pens...esp the I HEART JESUS pen cousin kelly gave me 4 work...ohhh yes.....

Kelly....one scoop of coffee for one cup? Fuck i used 2 and just made mud coffee...barf

angst angst angst

after watching a 620 lb woman lose 420 lbs and deal with *left over* skin ive decided to stay fat until i die.
thats my epiphany 4 the day...thank you.

i slept in my bed again...yay.
Ayla's new school year is off to a great start...she loves her new teacher (who lets them be more grown up and accountable for themselves) in grade 7 and has a bunch of friends in her class thank gawd so im hoping this will make her a little more social this year...I realize this could bite me in the ass but its healthier than the anti-social tendencies she has.

im so behind on everything...the house...my friends/communication...life...im gunna need 9 days off next week just to get my shit together.
I need a ride to the comox ferry from victoria...anyone planning a trip up island and want to be bombarded with good conversation and gas $? shit id rather sit in a car and chat and give someone a wad then sit on a train and have some retarded tourist try talking to me in german.

havent talked to the englishman in a few days...
but jerri ann is ALIVE...she was away fishing all damn summer and now wants to live on a boat...as long as she got knocked up on a boat i wouldnt mind MuHAHAHAHAHA GET KNOCKED UP ALREADY LADY!!!!!!!

the drugs are kicking in, I feel dreamyish...
i went grocery shopping with donna and mags yesterday...gawd those 2 crack me up. i think now that Donna is having body crippling sex all the time Mags and I will hang out more and compare 12 yr old horror stories....shes has a 12 yr old son whos a freak like Ayla...we always have lots to talk about.

My ex englishman Anthony and his wife just had a BOY...Hamish! he was massive at 11 lbs 2 oz...not the biggest newborn ive seen but a close second...good gawd...can u imagine?
Also cousin Craig just had a little girl...Teigan...9 lbs...
Well done ppl...!!!

I think I need a nap now.

Tag...yer it now (thanks Michelle)

1. things that scare me-+ trust...loss...being vulnerable...committment

2. people who make me laugh-+ Ayla...stupid folk...Brucifer...most of my friends cuz I only like witty funny ppl

3. things I hate the most-+ judgement...elitism...poverty

4. things I don’t understand-+ religion...

5. things I’m doing right now-+ pining for drugs...rubbing crusties from my eyes

6. things I want to do before I die-+ see some anasazi ruins....see ireland...commit to one person w/o living in deadening fear

7. things I can do-+ make kick ass sushi...embarrass a 12 yr old in record time...self deprecation

8. ways to describe my personality-+ candid/forward...severe blurt-itis...peaks and valleys

9. things I can’t do-+ harness my emotions...maintain serious control...pretend

10. things I think you should listen to-+ your subconscious whispering to you at a very loud volume...

11. things you should never listen to-+ stupid ppl....your own bullshit...and crap music

12. things I’d like to learn-+ cameras...painting....the art of true acceptance

13. favourite foods-+ pizza...thai...japanese...anything BREAD

14. beverages I drink regularly-+ water...milk

15. shows I watched as a kid-+ Battlestar Galactica (i wanted to marry Apollo)...G Force...Bionic Woman/Man...Wonder Woman etc

so many things u cant do with a numb hand....

i think im just getting used to it now.

work today was mainly damage control...
and catch up.

10 more to go....muhahahahahha

my nasal passages are so fucking dry my nose bleeds if i rub my damn nose...in honor of my granny i stuff vicks vapo-rub up there every night to sooth and heal my nose of dryness...
my granny was always putting vicks up her nose...my mom inherited it but she sticks to the vicks tube sniffer things...i only use the vicks on special occasions like these, so i can honor the granny behaviour and blog about the silliness of it.

bed time for the gibbled....

damn thy uterus

well my sprogs in bed....school starts tomorrow. she is pumped!

i have all the rice krispies vacuumed up from princess maddies visit...

im still gibbled...i thought my hand was getting some feeling back but it was wishful thinking.
tomorrow im back at work for 11 days straight b4 my holidays kick in.
ugh

the englishman came over and watched V for Vendetta last night...surprising...
my nose is so dry i think this must be what it feels like to be a coke head.

i have my period (i knew u all wanted to know that) and i can honestly say this is the most symptomless period ive had in 20 yrs...hahaha be it the codeine...or the distraction of the neck thing i havent felt one cramp. lol

today's adventures

we saw this pigeon on the way to breakfast, in the park...then on the way home we saw a little hawk with it in its beak flying up in a tree....then he dropped it...then we stalked it even though Kelly is scared of birds and nearly laid a hershy egg in her pants when all the crows started trying to steal the dead thing from the hawk...then the fight was on! (click for a bigger look)

Maddie before I got the felt marker idea...
hahahahahaha I didnt write DIE on her back its just part of MadDIE!

POSER!
Hawt Chica~!

O o o o o hhhh

it might be a good thing...i think my hand is LESS numb today but i cant quite tell b/c im too stoned haha

Cousin Kelly and Ayla went to a movie so im watching the baby...shes sleeping so its pretty easy...I have a very unhealthy fear of looking after a baby who cries for their mom...it became clear to me after having my own kid that if i can plug a crying baby to my boob and quiet it I have no business looking after it...so if she wakes up and is traumatized im in for it hahaha

Ayla scored her Ked Shoes today...overpriced canvas crap to me but she loves them...she got all her school supplies today as well...did well budgeting herself so she could use the left over cash twds her shoes and some shirts.

She has completely GUTTED her room...tossed about 2 garbage bags full of crap away...like shes been reborn into someone new who has no interest in her possessions.
I have a few issues to hash out with her once our company is gone but otherwise I am determined to have a good year!!!
(yes I am high)

Thank u D. for the lovely drugs and sanity inducing goodies.

thank u Mel for the LOVELY leather GOD hair accessory...hahahaha omg and Ayla brought me some xtian newspapers and a jesus candle with fancy jesus box hahahahaha

940 pm:
well talk about jinxing ones self....that baby woke up and wailed for a half hour...her mom had to lv the movie and race home to save me from the screaming...my babysitting days are SOOOOO over. hahahahahhahahahaha naturally the second she saw her moms face she was all smiles and chuckles. Thank gawd she stopped crying hahahahha

Anyway...i think i am getting some feeling back in my hand....this excites me but im scared to get too excited...the baby crying probably gave me nuerological awakening...

L@@K WHO'S HOME!!!!!

Mistress of Gibbledness

Yeah im still alive...I honestly have a new appreciation 4 ppl who live with chronic pain...I think this shit could make me homicidal.
im waiting for the miracle of it all just disappearing but so far its not happening...I thought i had peaked but...nope, its worse.
The drugs are my best friend...although im trying hard to make sure they dont become my lover hahaha

9 am: Ayla comes home today! YAY!! and Kelly and baby Maddie will be here too for the weekend...im gunna try and get Sat off so i have 3 days in a row of not working in hopes itll help.
Ayla got a new doo apparently - SIDE BANGS! ooooh la la
I better get all my laundry off her bedroom floor hahaha ive been using her floor as my personal laundry sorting area all summer...

Well...TYDES should be married by now...lets all take a moment and pray to the goddess of dirtiness that he got some hot action on his honeymoon.... **MOMENT OF SILENT PRAYER**
we are rooting 4 ya brutha! haha

fuck its 10 am: MISSING TIME the aliens are stealing my time...oh wait thats the drugs. Duh

Ok i took tomorrow off...that makes 3 days off.....i think ill start visualizing the swelling going down...thats how desperate i am...
well this has taken me 4 hrs to complete and its not even that interesting...sorry