Sunday, June 10, 2012

Once upon a time...

I met someone in May 1989 that I knew for a mere 24 hours but...for some reason I have this 'thing' where I don't forget certain people...I have wondered for  20+ years about this person, wondered where life lead him, wondered if he was as interesting as I originally thought he was, if he was educated, if he struggled, what kind of happiness or sadness followed him around in life, etc.

I was only 18. My friend Tammy and I were mad Metallica fans and it was almost the end of grade 12 so we decided to hitchhike to Vancouver to see Metallica...we had floor tickets. It was the "and justice for all' tour...we were stoked. She had met some guy named Darrell at a dart tournament a while before who shared a house with some guys in Vancouver and that was where we were staying over night...the house was full of guys...3 at least if I was an 18 yr old girls fucking wonderland of virginal awesomeness I can assure you. I immediately fixated on the smart one...not just b/c he was clearly smart and could read (ha!) - he was cute....and OLDER! OMG...older and cute hanging out with us small town teenagers not even graduated yet. They were living the 'grown up life' I pined for (and later came to realize was not all parties and sleepovers with hot guys) - in the big city, beer in the fridge, from places far away.

Chris did not seem like he was settled in Vancouver at all...and he had a girlfriend. Even at 18 I was perceptive enough to figure that out in about 3 mins...but she lived in Ontario...and due to having few feminist inklings back then I didn't consider it a deterrent at all. Don't get judge-y on I said above, my virginity was still well intact at 18 and I had no intentions of ruining that marathon of curiosity and frustration...I just wanted to see if I was actually able to hold the interest of a older guy (turns out he was 25 at the time - at 18 that was a lot older - trust me) who was smart, taken and lovely to gaze at (this would be what is referred to as THE CHASE I guess). At the time my experience was rather limited to guys my own age which was rather disheartening and this was a serious adventure.

I have no recollection how much beer was consumed...I don't recall being hammered but that doesn't mean was a great night...Tammy ended up with Darrell and Chris and I talked and listened to music and made out all was fab...not just for the obvious reasons but mostly b/c Chris was really quite lovely...he didn't try to get in my pants...he wasn't a pig...I could tell he was conflicted (insert GF back home and my age here) but it was a genuine nice night from where I this day it seemed quite innocent...

I just found him on FB and he lives in China with his wife...and appears to be the same interesting guy from 1989...time will tell...I am pretty confident he has absolutely NO idea who I am (even though I sent a hello msg with photos of him and his friends from that trip) which is kinda funny...b/c it is the story of my life...I remember people, details of those people, their stories, their smiles, their smell....and I am often completely forgotten by these same people 5 mins after meeting them. It used to bother me...until I came to terms with the fact that it doesn't matter. ha ha ha I have a preoccupation with details, my mind is impressionable by people I find interesting and it is just how I am wired...I have forgotten more about that 24 hrs than I have memories are not is a remembering of how I felt more than remembering how things were...I left Vancouver NOT feeling used...NOT feeling discarded or taken advantage of by a person who could have easily done so...that is what made such an impression...the 100.00 that was stolen out of my wallet we never figured out who did was one of the 3 guys...I am looking fwd to picking this guys brain if he is receptive.

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