Thursday, March 31, 2011

this background...

reminds me of red blood cells...


Cousin made my day yesterday telling me about how you fainted and

barfed when you looked at Maddie getting stitches in her head....SERIOUSLY...I fuggin love it...I am sorry i outed u on FB - I didn't think it was anything more than one of life's fucked up things being made humorous by our human-ness! Don't feel bad...everyone in the Quadra People's Drug Store knows I am constipated by iron supplements so we are even really!

And yes -

Madelyn is ok..she fell out of a tree on her head...but she is tough and told me she just has to be careful brushing her hair for a while - no big deal. :o)

Woke up with a broken head and a broken shoulder today...getting old is awesome.

3 day payday this month...that extra

chq goes towards Ayla's annual bus pass, trip payment, odds n ends like my pre-order of MG's new CD and Ayla's Tech N9ne concert ticket and groceries. B-Byeeeeee - thank gawd for it though! Saves my bacon 2x a year!

I need a

fuggin nap....a stand up one that doesn't involve my shoulder...I think I have flattened out my new pillow so much that I have to find yet ANOTHER sleeping position that wont kill was my neck which is why I got a new pillow but now...the shoulder...oooooo the life of a beached whale crushing itself with it's own weight....sigh.



Wednesday, March 30, 2011


Pharmacies are retarded...rarely do you come across one that has any sense of privacy...I mean the addicts get their special corner to get their methadone etc at some of them but then when I go in to buy iron supplements some retard pharmacy guy shouts at me ARE YOU CONSTIPATED? in front of a store full of people...and proceeds to give me advice to drink more water with my iron to avoid constipation...HAHAHAHA If I was more sensitive I may have been terribly embarrassed but that shit just pisses me off...the social retardation of it...All he needed to ask (if anything at all – I mean he isn't a fucking Dr or a full blown pharmacist handing me some powerful drug or anything) was if I was having any symptoms...? Would that have been so difficult? I hate People's Drugs on Quadra...their customer service is shit now with all the newbs there and since they got rid of the nice ginger haired guy manager...he had some sense about it...the place sucks and looks like a dive. That was my adventure yesterday...being outted for my iron supplement constipation.

Since I have stopped tormenting myself with following international news the local Victoria news is even more grim it seems...the 2 little degenerates that raped, murdered and mutilated Kim Proctor are on trial and even though they plead guilty they now have to decide to sentence them as adults or not seeing as they were 16 and 17 at the time....if they get tried as adults they will spend 10 yrs in jail for sure....if not they spend 6 yrs guaranteed....Uhhh Id say stick with the 10 please...and really is that the best we can do? Is that what a life is worth? I have always found it odd that in the US you got more time for stealing someone's car than for defiling a is that? That is backwards thinking...those little assholes should spend every day of that 10 yrs doing hard labour...finger bleeding, back breaking hard labour...Amnesty International can kiss my grits on this one...they did it, they plead guilty, there is no DOUBT they are guilty...the planned, perverted and cunning nature of this crime is disgusting and disturbing for people that age – any age is not normal – they are not normal this day they are reportedly not sorry, not at all remorseful or a step closer to taking fact now they are trying to blame the other for it...I cannot help but feel terrible for their would be completely horrifying to create a monster like that...and I dunno how Kim's parents survived all this so far but...hats off to them for not blowing the fucking courthouse up.
Then there is the lovely story about a 20 yr old UVic student who was abducted near my house Friday night and raped by a car full of men for hours before being dumped near downtown...Yeah...loving city life right now...cops have nothing to go on. Awesome. Seriously considering getting Ayla a can of bear spray...but she would likely lose it like she loses her camera, wallet and phone on a regular basis hahaha

In other cat is still a spazz, my kid is going to Tech N9ne cuz I bought her a ticket during a fit of niceness, I am going to see a ballet called WONDERLAND next weekend that looks groovy...I hope there is indeed a big tranny looking dancer in it like the posters indicate...looks like I am heading to Lori's wedding in May in Parksville...quick, cheapo trip, lotsa fun to be had I am sure.....I have to pee now...I am drinking lotsa water you know...LOL

Sunday, March 27, 2011


Stephen Harper...please STFU. Gawd he is the epitome of a drama queen asshole.
Oh yay another federal election...if only it meant change. :|

On this fine Sunday I have plans with Arf and go chase bunnies or something...then laundry of some sort...then dinner for when Ayla is home from work later tonight...I got this cool glass bottle for dressing that my boss bought me cuz she is so nice...and on it there are about 7 homemade dressing this morning I made one...plain yogurt, OJ, minced ginger, garlic, pepper, a bit of oil and smells and tastes good...after sitting all day I think it'll be divine on the dinner salad.

I have decided I NEED a pot rack...after seeing one at Alex's on Friday I decided a small little one would change my gawd damn life...I have 2 hooks above my kitchen sink that would be PERFECT to hang a simple small one...I looked around and thought this one would be the most practical....
Then I thought....WHY CAN'T I MAKE THAT!?
Would it work if I just got a nice solid piece of wood, 2 nice hooks on top and then  4-5 on the bottom...?? Then nice chain to hang it at the right height from the already existing hooks?? RIGHT? Anyone with some building savvy see anything wrong with this design? Keep in mind I have hideously UGLY cupboards in this apt so even at its ugliest potential this thing will not look out of place (haha) please. It looks like this one has slidey hooks...I don't need that - just screwed into the wood would be ok...I think.

Hanging out at Alex's on her birthday Friday was nice...her son Escher is a real cutie...and Alex and Kelsey had good snacks out and good ppl over when I arrived...later when the good ppl left and then the sketchers came I vacated. ZERO desire to hang out with losers...turns out A&K were not in love with their final set of visitors either...ugh.

Thursday was Donna's birthday - we met up with a few peeps at the 5th St Bar & Grill...had a good dinner...and I brought Ooh La La cupcakes for dessert...Caramel Chocolate Brownie Cupcakes...fml they were good. Highlight of the night was Erin finding raw eggs in Donna's bag in the back seat as she crawled in and tossing one on the street to prevent Donna from eating it the next day *ewwwww* and then the other egg being broken in the bag and Erin being goo covered...Donna laughed SO hard...that alone was funny.

Wedding May 7 in Parksville...looks like I will go and watch Lori and Rich tie the knot....I think Ayla will come with me which will be fun b/c it is sure to be a great party. We will stay at Guy and Donna's and do it on the cheap!

Friday, March 25, 2011




Wednesday, March 23, 2011


So there I was in my dream last night...with my Uncle Robert...on a mission to get my poor dead brother to the crematorium...we had him wrapped in garbage bags really neat and tidy and then roped for easy carrying...for some reason in this dream this was not morbid at all, it was what we needed to do one around us questioned it as we are going from place to place never being able to find where we need to be there is a tsunami warning....we keep on trudging around Robert had one end I had the other...the whole while I am talking to my brother like this is completely normal letting him know we were nearly there...then the WAVE can be seen @ a distance and like retards in movies we go down 3 floors to a parking lot and as we get there the wave is nearly at our heels...Robert took off up some stairs....and I said to my brother "Sorry Brother!" and started running up this hill....all the while of course I am moving in slow fucking motion....cannot run to save myself - and I am thinking how glad I am that I wrapped my brother in plastic so the water wont bother his skin...LIKE WTF...?

I have got to stop listening to CBC b/c this tsunami/earthquake/radiation shit is fucking with my mind.....

Needless to say i woke up at 4 am rather horrified that I would ever be so flippant with my brother....fml.

PS Thanks Uncle Robert for all your help hahahaha

Tuesday, March 22, 2011


OMG Maureen's pics of Havana just make me wanna go there all the more AGAIN this year...This was her 2nd trip to made me droooool! Amazing cemetery pictures and such...fml...that is the 1st place I am going once I am done paying for my kid's junk! I will even go by myself I don't even care!

Life on the Conklin Ranchero is fairly quiet and boring...I had a year of someone bugging the shit out of with that force of nature relocated I am kind of lost...haha I have my bedroom tip top again and have cheared out 33 shirts to go to the consignment store...yeah that IS embarrassing. The cat is no longer interested in the closet since the re-org and i leave the closet OPEN just so she doesn't think there is anything in there she needs...mission accomplished.

Just culled a buncha ppl on reason really just don't care to know about them and dont care 4 them to know about me.
Kind of wandering about in a daze these days trying to recalibrate myself...Ayla's is back to douche-o-rama-ville this that I got such a long dose of her humanity it is really depressing and I do home she was just having a shit day and it is not a complete 180 again.

Started my earthquake kit....I have 30 bottles of water in the closet. I better get crackin' on the rest. haha

Sunday, March 20, 2011

...and then there were 2...+ a cat.

Very weird week here @ the Conklin Abode. With G moving him and his things back to Campbell River to take care of some shit and find his way - I have continued with my initial feeling of being torn...which has morphed into a weird numb-type of coasting. I miss him a lot though not all of his stuff which makes me all the more sad that he was not able to just rent his own place and stay in town...but maybe later he can make his way back here to the city. Time will tell. When you strip away all the things about a situation that don't work for you - you sure realize what does work for you...

I have forgotten what I used to do when I actually had time to myself. I have rearranged the bedroom and made it 1 person friendly again...rearranged the living room a up, organizing...staying busy generally...Ayla hasn't been feeling well so shes been home a lot (spring break) when shes isn't working and has basically moved into the living room - she is in love with Netflix haha She has still been really decent...3 weeks and counting! I wont elaborate as I am scared I will jinx it.

The cat is depressed though I am sure I am humanizing her and pushing my own emotions at her hahaha she certainly misses her best friend Graeme and all his fun...she hasn't been too crazy...she is still getting used to what the new NOW is too.
I avoided a bunch of really good rock shows this weekend at the Capital City Tattoo Convention... :o( Buzzard and Rotterdam...just couldn't bring myself to go and be immersed in a social scene. Instead I swapped tables with Donna...I gave her my old table a few yrs back...the black top one and decided I wanted it and traded her for my small pine one that she preferred anyway so it worked out well. I fucking LOVE having a rectangle table again LOVE LOVE LOVE! I also love that this table was Pam and Jim's and I think is 20 yrs old. :o)

Aunty Cathy is planning a fall visit which is awesome...can't wait for that...will save some vacation days up for sure so I can have time off while she is here for a change and do some cool things.

Today I am going to a movie with Donna...THE LINCOLN looks good..I will be sad if it is just mediocre like UNKNOWN was...thankfully I love Liam Neeson (haha I just typed Niam Leeson hahahaha)
I am currently in the process of raping my closet for all my fat(ter) clothes and shit I wont wear and am going to consign them...I have a grand worth of clothes sitting in a basket already and if I can get 20 buck for it I will be happy haha...I have curbed my shopping habits now and only buy things I am 100% sure of and KNOW that I will wear...FOR REAL! Either way the fatty consignment store will be getting to know me!

I got new old chair at work and I am fucking in love with it...LOVE...I was given permission to order a new chair b/c mine was shyte...up to 400.00 (which hurt my feelings b/c to me a 400.00 chair better vibrate and get me off at that price) - Doris who has a 900.00 chair, the kind with no fabric, its all swanky and awesome comfy decided she hated her chair so I told her I would take her chair and she could order a 400.00 chair....SOLD!!!! I don't care what anyone says - I completely won that contest of creativity... Click on my chair!

Donna's birthday is Thursday...I have set up a dinner at 5th Street for her...with some other friends...should be fun. She is going camping on the weekend so I stole the day of her birthday to celebrate it rather than waiting for the weekend.
Was talking to Phil recently - Ayla's father - he was telling me the California gov't was making him pay for medical for Ayla which is dumb b/c 1) she doesn't reside in the US and 2) she already has it here via me. He has a court date April 4 about it so I drew him up a letter and made copies of all her proof of medical and extended benefits and sent it to him via email and hard copy. He seemed so genuinely surprised I was being helpful. Uhhhhhh wtf is that about? 12 yrs ago he was ordered to pay 200.00/mo - I have never gone back for more $ even though I was clearly within my right to do b/c I know what he earns and 200.00 is fuck all. I have considered sending her to him and paying him 200.00/mo and let me tell you THAT WOULD BE A DEAL FOR ME lol (kidding, I have never considered ever sending Ayla anywhere...she is my heart!) Anyhow...I have never been malicious or underhanded with him and it shocks me that he would assume I wouldn't help him out with that...does he deserve my help? No. But....this little favor is going to come back on him when Ayla is graduated and settled on schooling b/c I will be asking him to help me out with it...if he says no then that is ok...b/c I don't expect anything but he can live with the added karma.

Hank Moody is doing awesome!!!
The squawking gulls woke me up this morning...they are back... :| I am not pleased by this weekend sleep in buzz kill...truth be known sleeping til 8 am is astounding to me and I would have peed the bed if I slept any longer so it isn't the end of the world..just annoying...the squawk...fuck. I think they are here nesting and such til mid/late summer...?? Guy can u confirm...I block it out every year....

Monday, March 14, 2011


-I am on my lunch break...-I am hungry.-I haven't not begun eating yet.-I did not eat a proper breakfast as the search for cat vomitus took up too much of my time this morning.-Ayla is still being human and awesome and im scared to get too used to it in case she starts being a dinkis again but omfg it makes my life SO FUCKING MUCH EASIER...I cannot articulate the peace!!-Graeme is moving to Campbell River Thursday. I am torn. Torn like an 11 yr old birthing a 25 lb toddler.-I have 29374834753875 projects lined up to keep me busy thus avoiding becoming a victim of my own self.-I need a wireless network card...anyone selling one they aren't using before I go buy one from a bastard store?-I need new jeans. The 3 month thigh rub is up on mine...any day now I shall be sauntering about town in crotchless jeans.-Feeling kind of outta touch from shit...too wrapped up in my own head most likely.-Connie u are awesome...keep up the goodness!-Wants to live rent free without having to fuck some old gross guy.-I am so glad to not be in Japan I cannot even tell you - those poor bastards...the footage is mind-numbing. It makes me REALLY fucked up about living where I live...Like walking around on dynamite.-Daylight Savings can seriously FUCK OFF now.-Wonders when Guy is gunna visit Victoria again so we can cruise for weirdos/hookers while digesting thai food...-Wonders when her Aunty Cathy is does Ayla...!!-I just stretched and made a really weird noise.-I think my legs are going to explode.-I have no idea how I manage to lower my cholesterol every check is really stupidly low for a fatty...woot!-Change is good Donkey!-Is gunna stop biting her nails on one hand (the other one is unbitten already) so she looks like a well adjusted human - almost.-Is doing the 10K Walk with Tracey, Ardene & Lani in a few mths...-I am sad my new Keens that I love are not working for me...I am such a fatty-shoe princess. Guess I will stick to Merrells.-Point form blogging is is like I am making myself a list.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

eat dammit.

Hank Moody won't eat.
There is more food sitting at the bottom of his bowl than I have ever witnessed him eat...gotta go look up the eating habits of bettas.


Life choices steeped in low self any? Sit and think about is an interesting exercise.

Wednesday, March 09, 2011


Ayla has caved and started playing Settlers of Catan with Graeme and took about 20 mins and she was hooked....we played again last night where she proceeded to annihilate both G and I...even the last game she was behind the whole time getting nothing she needed and she still won! She is murderously competative...its fun playing with her...she adds good laughs that's for sure. She has been a total doll since getting back from PR...thats a very long stretch for her....the whole trip she was lovely and still is! I am ENJOYING! Last night we sat down and signed her up for her Cancun Adventure...I am gunna do my best to not think myself into a nervous breakdown...I did find myself rather excited for her though as I surfed for extra info etc looks rather awesome...

Monday, March 07, 2011

Torn Ripped Shredded like a dogs chew toy

Another weekend whizzed by...I am currently in full blown high emotional premenstrual turmoil...I am still sick and feeling like poop but I did get a fish! Figured I would end up buying all the stuff for Ayla's impending betta fish so I got myself one - he is a lovely peacock feather blue/green one I named HANK MOODY. I will need distractions next month with G moving back to CR. It is all civil-like and for the best most certainly but I cannot help but feel conflicted about it...but whatever I don't want to talk about any of it.

Last night Ayla asked to play Settlers of Catan with us which was rather shocking....and just like I knew she would she LOVED it...she is competative and nuts hahaha Was fun to have 3 ppl play it...USUALLY ITS JUST G AND ME AND WE HAVE ALTERED THE GAME SLIGHTLY SO IT WORKS WITH 2 PPL. oops caps. So that was fun for the 3 of us...G and I Wii'd too which was fun as i tried tacking golf HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Quote from Graeme: why cant you just hit it softly?!

Friday, March 04, 2011

Back in the saddle...

Back to work today for a day...
Missing PR oddly enough...seems the older I get the less I hate going there...MINUS the distance and travel of course...oh sweet jesus I do not enjoy the travel part.

Had a good visit with my mom with Ayla in tow and even had some pretty good laughs! Was super cute seeing them knitting teacher Ayla how to purl...

This uncoordinated ninny opted out of knitting entirely.

Wednesday, March 02, 2011


in POWELL RIVER b/c the wind is too horrible 4 the ferry to run....

i invented a new term....
u know how black ppl talk 'ebonics'...

Ebonics is a term that was originally intended to refer to the language of all people descended from enslaved Black Africans, particularly in West Africa, the Caribbean, and North America. Over time, and especially since 1996, it has been used more often to refer to African American Vernacular English (distinctively nonstandard Black United States English), asserting the independence of this from (standard) English. The term became widely known in the U.S. in 1996 due to a controversy over its use by the Oakland School Board.

Well the way gay ppl talk is 'gaybonics'...
Shawn speaks GOOD gaybonics.

Tuesday, March 01, 2011


I am running outta timeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....we go home tomorrow and I dont wanna!!!!!!!!