Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Demoralization 101

Well...where shall I begin?

1st off...another phone bill rolled in today...much the same as the one last month unfortunately. Why did i give birth again? Oh that's right, I'm an idiot.

2nd...did you know that gov't interviews are based on a point system? I didn't either...I also did not know that if you are a full time govt employee and you apply for other positions within the gov't you are given an automatic 10 points.
So...while I scored the highest orally (ha!) and otherwise once the 10 points were added to the 2 govt employees scores I was bumped down to 3rd place...there are only 2 positions.
If one of them dies or is tragically wounded in an ice cream truck accident, the job is automatically mine...or if one of then declines the offer.
I am not holding my breath though and have already applied for a bunch of other jobs with my updated resume...
It is weird to not get a job based on performance...I can handle not getting a job b/c there is a better person suited but to not get it b/c of a few points...THAT'S GAY.

It is a drag but...whatever...I'm not letting it ruin my life...it isn't like I am in love with that job, I may end up with one I like a lot more. I am just obviously anxious about securing something permanent...and I am not looking fwd to interviewing 3475983475894x again.

Rich and Shawn stopped by last night...Rich is gone back to Alberta...love affair over...you'll see a picture of the 2 of them on my couch and it is apparent the flame went out on that haha Poor Shawn :o(
The cat has taken to eating ppls hair/skulls, she stares, then bites....then rubs herself all over and toys with it and tries to eat it again....its quite the process...see photographic evidence.



so innocent, simply admiring his skull....


a closer look, a niff...

then ARG!!!!! Skull Biter Cat!

love is not in the air....is it?

cat proceeding to rub herself all over Rich

sooo relaxed after a skull hump fest



sooo in loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Monday, September 29, 2008

cheese is a kind of meat!

I am moody.
I know it seems silly that I am stating what is likely obvious to the rest of you but...it hasn't always been obvious to me.

It is Monday here in the pubicle...I cheerfully ate a scone this morning...
I am loving this fall weather...
Saw a few movies this weekend...

CHOKE, based on the novel by the guy that wrote the FIGHT CLUB book...was a great movie, went with Arika and we laughedddddddddddd....(Guy you will like this movie)
Then I went to see the LUCKY ONES with Cyn & Andrea...the 2 of them laughed like hyenas through the whole thing, scaring away 2 older ladies that were seated in front of us...they ended up moving much further up front hahahaha
It was funny as well but not like CHOKE...

2 days til I have a roommate...this is gunna be interesting. hahahahaha (See my MOODY comment above haha)

I am on hold with Ryerson University right now...they have the worst friggin on hold music....crappy jazz....
Last night Ayla flipped her lid and got in my face about how I never cook for her...
hmmm thats funny...i spent all morning preparing produce for her, making it easy to cook....also buy the small packages of meat making it really easy to thaw and cook...and when I do cook guess who never wants anything? Yeah. So when i don't cook anything I am suddenly a bad mother...this whole exchange was stupid and at the end I told her to enjoy her itchiban noodles all week bc like I feel like cooking a damn thing for her now...
Ingrate....DO YOU HEAR THAT AYLA.....INGRATE!!!!!

Moving on....on hold 10 mins now...fuck u Ryerson.

1 PM ~ interesting chat with the unit manager today...wants me to consider going for higher rated jobs in the ministry/unit...ohhh yeah baby....all I have to do is get on permanent here in this unit and I then can do all sorts of temp. assignments in any other dept. at higher pay grades...SOUNDS GOOD TO ME!!! an R14 or R18 pay grade would give me a HUGE MASSIVE BONER.

I am eating a lot of celery these days...celery isn't all that great without cheese whiz...but eating it with cheese whiz defeats the purpose of eating celery in the 1st place...
I like all the inside bunch of the celery, the WHITE TENDERALS (tenderilllllsss?) OF BABY CELERY....mmmmmmmm not that bitter old green crap....
im sure in the world of celery I AM THE BITTER OLD GREEN CRAP.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

mini-road trip

okay Duncan is a shithole...
but thats besides the point.

The venue, The Duncan Garage Showroom, was quite cool and interesting...the sound there was fab, very small, dark, intimate...seriously nice.
Poor Ryan was sick as hell but it did not impact his performance at all, he sounded as good as ever and put on a great show. Tomorrow is the homecoming show for him in Vancouver then he can have a rest and get better.

Was nice to meet his honey Kathleen in person as well...

We went to a pub 4 dinner before the show next to the venue and were a little skeptical of the prices, they were very low....turns out the food was fine and the portions were gigantic and the ppl watching was not bad either.

On the way home to Victoria I opted out of stripper night at the Fox and just came home to teenagers who promptly irritated me...til i scared em into Ayla's room 4 the night...

I was fairly distracted by the fact Richard msg'd me earlier in the day about being lost and split up from Neil in Munich, leaving him with no $ or stuff etc...b/a I hadn't heard from him after that I spent the night with worst case scenarios swirling around in my head....I rang him when I got in and he was fine....looks like Neil got arrested and due to beer and such neither of them were smart enough to follow their own *IF WE GET SEPARATED* plan. Dipshits (haha) By the time I called he was sorted and sounding charming with his english twang.

Today I dunno what to do today...I cant stay around here though b/c my kid will drive me fucking mad....and I think shes staying home today....its nice and crap out...time for a good walk....

Duncan - the shithole of the island (aside from the places north of Courtenay haha)


Cynthia, Tara, Donna


I really was wanting to steal this...


Tara & Donna thought this dog was adorable...Cyn & I thought it was mangy and needed grooming haha




Donna getting fresh with Mr Lego Pirate Man




then the skirt get yanked up....oh Tara....


Donna hamming it up! hahah get it hamming it up! hahahha

Friday, September 26, 2008

anyone have some thread?

Busy morning here @ work…love it!

Got a lovely email from a higher up telling me we needed to meet and discuss my future career goals.

Hmmmm…interesting considering I do not have a permanent position yet (another week to go they say)…not sure what that means aside from the fact I am being WASTED here at this job…Ive been told repeatedly to learn this job and MOVE on up asap…no arguments from me.

Road trip tonight to Duncan is going to be a hoot…Me, Cyn, Donna and Tara in one vehicle. I think my non-swearing will have to be put on hold for the evening.

I think I already ranted about this but im gunna rant again just cuz its funny…so I spent a few days conversing with a guy online who at the end of day 2 outed himself as a minister…. Can u believe he then had the religious balls to ask me if I believed in god and then stopped talking to me b4 I even got a chance to fuck with him??? RUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shawn is single again…that means I get him all to myself again….CACKLE!! I wasn't wishing for him to be single…I was happy 4 him but I was a little worried he might get murdered in his sleep, that's all.

Got a lovely wee package from Jerri Ann today…she always hooks me up with my favorite smell by sending me this amber resin perfume stuff that gives me a boner…Oooo yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhh THANK YOU JERRI!!

Ok…so I am in love with Noel Fielding and his messed up nose…and his hair and girlish self…the way he dances and sings songs to me:

Calm a llama down,
Calm a llama deep down in the ocean blue,
Like a barnacle,
Sitting in a tight place,
Laughing at a monkey arm,
Pulling like a China boy
Carraway, Carraway, Carraway,
Noise!
Boing Cheeka Masala ~ Boing Cheeka Masala

He sings to me…I just wanna hang out with him….and feel his hair…share lip gloss with him. Laura from the UK informed me yesterday on facebook that she met him and he's kissed her 3x. Sighhhhhhhhhhhh…. I wonder if he prances about singing all the time? Now I must go to the UK and see his wonder in action. I do not understand why they have not managed to infiltrate Canadian culture yet…u can not find Mighty Boosh paraphernalia anywhere. U cant buy the discs…the cds….nothing…ive resorted to ordering some pins online to satisfy my urge to consume the Mighty Boosh…it could become a sickness…but itll pass like all my other sicknesses.

Don't worry, you're all getting Mighty Boosh DVDs for xmas MUAHHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I just blew a button on my new kermit the frog green shirt and get to spend the day walking around with an alligator clip keeping my boobs in my shirt....Maybe ill start a trend...??

drunkin' duncan


tonight straight after work me and some gals are hopping in a car and driving to duncan to see ryan mcmahon play...weird going TO duncan for such a show...duncan is the kind of place u usually leave to see shows.

i will not be partaking in the alcoholic potential of the evening...cuz that is just how i roll these days...

will finally get to meet kathleen his sweetheart and his manager...

it will be a night away from the mighty boosh for me...i may go into convulsions....
i cant stop watching....

in a unit meeting yesterday this one woman i work with whose loud and obnoxious behaviour far surpasses anything i could come up with drunk or on crack was SO rude to the unit manager that i was actually dumbfounded. u know when someones so rude and ignorant it makes u REALLY uncomfortable? to the point u cant even speak bc you are blown away at the blatant rudeness? that was me yesterday...i dont like this woman to start with...shes loud, bitchy and has no manners...i generally just avoid her altogether.
all the whispering and gossip going on in that place is like jr high...me and my mp3 player, we just stay clear.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

chili con deadly

NOTE TO SELF: do not eat chili after 6 pm for dinner...
 
I was up at 4:23 am today, woken out of a DEAD sleep by chili heartburn from Hades...omfg...i got up and ate 3875375983753 rolaids and drank a glass of milk and it took me an hour to be able to consider going to bed.....so at 530 i went back to bed for an hour...
 
Chili tastes damn good...I ate it again for lunch.  All I can taste is friggin chili though.
 
My lovely sprog did dishes yesterday...Every glass in the drying rack had food on it...one glass even had a CHUNK of food on it. In my day, as a lazy ass teenager who would rather be electrocuted that do a chore, i did dishes poorly on purpose bc i knew my mom would eventually stop asking...it worked.
Ayla on the other hand isn't so cunning (on this topic anyway) and I think she just sucks at it...I don't mind SO much, id prefer to wash the dishes im eating off of anyway but omfg i hate coming home to a kitchen I have to clean b4 i can even start making a meal.
I do love it that she's the garbage taker outter...I friggin hate that job.
 
I am trying to curb my potty mouth. Notice all the FRIGGIN's going on? I can stop biting my nails so I can stop swearing like a trucker....right?
My over use of profanity lessens the real punch behind them when I really am PO'd about something.
I guess im trying to bring back the GRAND GUSTO of the F word for myself.
 
2.5 hrs of work left to go today...someone just shoot me please.

Monday, September 22, 2008

monday monday

u know, unless im shitting my pants or at high risk of puking on myself i show up at work...even if I am high as a fucking kite....3 ppl called in sick today...so its phones all day.
weird thing about this gov't business...everyone gets the same raise each year...it is not based on performance at all so it doesn't matter how GOOD you are at your job...this must be why no one tends to work any harder than anyone else.
naturally, you will not want to be a slacker if u have any intention of moving into other positions bc then of course that will factor in....but for the most part all this standing around and chatting and extended coffee breaks are par 4 the course...
it is an odd environment, it doesn't entice ppl to be MORE productive which is weird...
i just shake my head.
the weather has turned...im sure im a typical minority in that i am so gleeful for the change in weather...it is so friggin cold in the house now im in my glory!
and outside I walk along...listening to russell brand or mighty boosh skits on my mp3 player and smile and giggle....feeling like a fucking hero in the COLD ASS AIR....ohhhh the cool crisp weather of fall...washing away all my misery from summer...allowing me to wear any friggin hoodie I so choose...
i think I can burn my smelly sandals now!
i watched my 1st full episode of the mighty boosh on sunday...i now want to marry noel fielding and buy all the seasons on dvd.
did u know in Europe they serve beer at McD's?!?!?! in Belgium you can order a stella with your greasy dinner! and in France they have something called MYSTIC CHICKEN! Richard better try that while he is there and report back....
Mystic Chicken....you eat it and it tells u your fortune....it mutters secrets of the future from your belly.....ohhh yes Mystic Chicken!
game night at shawn and rich's place the other night was interesting...one of those scenarios where you realize you are too weird to hang out with ppl who are not at least partially or as fully weird as you w/o feeling like a caged animal ppl are sitting around looking at, wanting desperately to poke at u with sticks.
i did get to sit beside a lot of really cute gay boys...a hot little muslim one too who was a good sport about being called a terrorist all night...
the hot gay banker was so shiny! I couldn't stop looking at his face...he looked scrubbed clean and lovely and he made choc chip cookies and brought a basket of them for gawds sake!!?!?!?!?
today is fire alarm testing day so the shrill sound of the fire alarms going on 10x a minute is driving me fucking batshit.
just let us burn for gawds sake....!!!!!!!!!
ive decided I want a boyfriend. (Sept 23/08 - 5 am - I have changed my mind already hahahahaha please disregard)
now i just have to find one i can stand who can stand me back.
pauline recommends looking for men a little older than myself...this of course is something FOREIGN to me bc im a little quirky and teenage minded in some ways i cant imagine someone older than myself being even close to my level of oddness....ECCENTRIC, whatever u want to call it...i dunno...time will tell...if u read about a middle aged man bashing a girl on the head for randomly humping his leg in the paper its probably me.

babies and ball cuppers


THE BALL CUPPER....unrelated to other pictures coming up.


Ohhhh BABY CEDAR I LOVE YOU!


Mama Mary, Baby Cedar, Brother Austin and Papa Kori
See how Cedar is reaching out for me there....?


I dont usually like boy babies....but he is DEEEELISH!!!!!


Concentrating super hard...MUST FOCUS ON THE HAND!

Saturday, September 20, 2008

the mighty boosh

ohhhh im getting addicted to the mighty boosh....not only is noel fielding hot in a weird kinda way the comedy team that is the might boosh is fucking retardedly funny....the fact that russell brand and noel fielding are pals just makes it better...
 
if u have not heard the how to calm a llama song then you have not lived...
 
today is a trip to the hideous thing that is walmart...then tonight is shawn and rich's housewarming party...yes its true, I get to go party with an apt full of gay men...no chance of meeting anyone there....sighhhh (ha ha ha)
 
i just ripped something off my face, it looked like if not obliterated it would turn into a skin tag in time and there will be NONE of that...i will buck off any and all foreign matters that begin growing on my face...it is just my own personal rule.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

tonight i went to the alps

someone at work gave me free tickets to see an imax (THE ALPS) movie so shawn and i went...now i wanna go to switzerland...add that to my list of places to see.

weird night with shawn...his new BF is a bit of a whacko we are thinking...jury is still out though...

congrats to Michelle B for the new job! u fucking rule!

Happy Birthday Richard....not only is it his b'day but hes off on a trip through europe for the next 2 weeks!!!! NICE! Have a great time! u fucker! TRAVEL BLOG

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

gawddddddddd

theyre making me wait 2 MORE weeks to find out about this friggin permanent position.

CONGRATS TO PAULINE B for getting herself a SWANKY PAYING NEW JOB after 8ish yrs at home with kids! well done sister!!!

prozac chowder soup

Why must he emit such beauty? -->

I have got to go to costco and buy a VAT of evening primrose oil capsules....my head is all over the fucking map...it irritates the shit outta me as im generally fairly together even if im in a piss poor state of mine but this laughing one minute and bawling my head off the next is just fucking stupid.

I think the impending DATE that is approaching may not be helping either...I really miss my brother...I cant believe next month it will be 8 yrs he is gone. I am amazed by my own non belief of this considering its been THE worse thing to ever happen in my little sphere of world. I recently met one his and Kim's friends they grew up with, Loren, and I think its tweaked me out. I look at Loren, who I have heard about forever and feel like I know and I cant help think that Glenn would have been a grown up now...full fledged...he'd be 32...he could have been married or making babies...he would still be calling me names for getting 3rd row floor Tool tickets last year....it is all so fucking depressing. (DO NOT COMMENT IN THE COMMENTS PLZ, I don't need a pat on the back and a hey hey I just need to blurt)

Hows that for 6 am?

I am hungry...need to buy some stuff to make smoothies out of all this gross yogurt in the fridge. No more welfare yogurt purchases....I've sworn to Ayla, no more cheap yogurt haha

This book im reading is a trip: THE BOOK
im just a little way into it but it already makes me stop and go Hmmmmmmmmmmm

I am reading 3 friggin books right now....decided to tackle the DANCE OF ANGER book again (all male readers just cringed right then)...the feminist part of it is a little redundant, I do not have a problem EXPRESSING anger b/c i think i should be a delicate flower for all men to devour (haha) quite the opposite - I just need to be more mindful of where its coming from so as not to rip the nards off certain ppl in my path (I'M SORRY, you know who you are haha)...I am a chronically pissed off person...how do you morph that shit into something productive? That is the question. We could get into where it stems from but i don't have all day here hahaha

My trainer person yesterday spoke to me yesterday like I was a dumb child and I wanted to punch her in the face. I have trained a shit load of ppl and I do not expect anyone who was told something 2 months previous ONCE to remember how to do it or really even what its for. So I am gunna spend ALL my spare time reading manuals at work (even though they are really poorly set up and presented) and the policy book...just to spite the universe. And that stupid twat that started with me...gawd i wanna whack her with a mallet too...just cuz. I hate everyone, except old man Dan beside me, he is the only smart person in that joint. We talk about books, we is smrt!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Sunday, September 14, 2008

sex pistols on a sunday


god save the queen alright....woot woot!

omfg i had a dream about Bruce last night...i think bc Arika and I were talking about him last night when she was here...
i was on a bus and he got on with a baby in a cardboard box...and he was being all standoffish and shit being a twat and i was holding the box the baby was in and was horrified bc it wasn't comfy or safe so i offered him the Snugglie I had from when Ayla was a baby (I still have it in real life) and he refused it.....i was really pissed off in the dream and contemplated taking off with the kid in the box (same as I contemplated running off with his daughter Ashleigh in 1991)...woke up pondering that for a while...analyzed the shit out of it...then call blocked my # and called his to make sure he was still alive....he answered so i hung up. HA!

so hes alive and still a dumb fucking asshole...some shit never changes.

had a good night with Arika last night...we dined responsibly (that means we didn't eat bread HA HA HA)...and i scored the COOLESTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT jesus on cross LED lights!!! those are so going in my room!!!!! Thank you Arika! I am impressed she was able to part with them.....

Maggie is picking out baby names and Aunty Pam is poo-pooing her initial options hahahaha Aunty Pam is fun sometimes!

Talked to my wee sister this morning....she called me a loser but I didn't take it personally haha We talked about deer meat, her bow & arrow, and Ayla visiting next summer...I think it would be great...her and Rob so a lot of fun shit so it would be good for Ayla to go bond with her aunty and do some cool new things.....

I really wanna go see this today CLICK HERE
I wanna laugh...today feels like a solo movie day...Ayla doesn't get how I can go to movies by myself...but...it is actually quite enjoyable...I sit where i want...I can cry and blubber all I want...I can sit at the end and watch all the credits...or bolt if I want...I could ultimately molest myself as well.....hahaha

I just weaseled in on 4 loads of laundry in a row!!
Now I know today is gunna be a good day!

Saturday, September 13, 2008

pictorial even for the day


Mad Dog Davies....who would have thought this little cherub looking creature would get yellow highlighter all over my couch? Just so u all know, it comes right out! haha


Hello? I am calling from my wooden cat toy, can you send over some couch cleaner PRONTO!?


..and the heavens opened to reveal mac n cheese with just the right amount of ketchup......


Hello, my name is Jen and I've lost my glasses so now all the bags under my eyes show. Thank you for looking.




Deanna...these booklets you and I used to make 4 each other and exchange are now my coffee table reading for company...they get great reviews haha


the cat on HIGH ALERT with the cherb baby around


Oh yes hello...can you send over some Midol for my Aunty Jen please?

if u are not swallowing the solution you are part of the problem....


I love that line.

hahahaha

ask me why im up at 6 am on my day off?
my uterus is the devil and my pelvis feels like its about to blow apart...no fucking shit...it feels like im giving birth.

speaking of giving birth...cousin Maggie is EL PREGGO!!!!!!! now while i do not advocate spawning at the moment (haha) this is great news for Maggie who has wanted to be a mommy for a long while.
congrats!

now, who wants the thing i feel like im about to birth right now....anyone??

Friday, September 12, 2008

friday is the real hump day


the cat has taken to sitting on the back of my computer chair and biting at the towel i have on my head in the AM.

it is somewhat amusing.

i need to find the kitty clippers and declaw this little fucker...a trim is in order, shes getting caught on everything...i guess it has been a while since we held her down and did the deed.

tonight shall be pure bliss...i fucking love friday nights...i love knowing i have 2 days of freedom...fridays are a party even if u do nothing but play facebook scrabble or watch a movie in the dark by yourself ~ there is a pathetic image for you - plenty more where that came from too, dont get me started...

ive been contemplating the roomie for a month thing and humoring myself over the fact that i make offers such as this when in all reality the last thing i want is an intruder intruding in my solitude that is home...but im a sucker for ppl in a bind, esp if they have crazy mothers and are trying to set themselves up, it is tough and wtf, a month if inconvenience for me is no big deal compared 2 the $ they can save to get their own place living rent free for a month...it is near impossible to save to get a damage dep and 1st months rent if u are paying rent elsewhere.

we shall see how i feel about being so altruistic half way through next month hahaha

Thursday, September 11, 2008

pubicle gossip

it is nearly fridayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!! woooohooooooooooooo
i can smell a smell in my house and can not determine its origin...its not a bad smell...just not familiar.
saturday night Arika is coming over and we are gunna sit and look at the elliptical and whinge about being fat...we may even be eating something bad at that very moment.
did i tell you im having a house guest in Oct for the month? should be interesting as u all know how i love to wander the house half dressed to stay cool. hahahaha poor kid, will probably stroke out the 1st week. hahaha
richard in the uk has a cold...lets all gather around in a circle....hold hands and will it to be completely gone by Sept 20 when he & neil leave on their holiday to train around europe........
doesn't that make u die inside...the idea of cruising around europe? omg...it gives me a complete and utter boner. i look fwd to all his photos and funny stories...and adventures with the rubber chicken.
ohHHhhhhHhh 3 paydays in october.........WOOOHOOO!!!!!!!

i should find out next week if i got the permanent position at work...will be weird if i don't bc ill be looking for work at work and its totally allowed...even if i have interviews they let u go do them and u still get paid...unions are so wacky!

Oh nevermind

it is because I was a nazi in my last life.....

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Goddess grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change...

WHY AM I BEING PUNISHED?

sometimes....

it isn't until you are up late with freezing cold feet that you realize how alone you are in the world...the ultimate futility in that conscious/unconscious search to seek understanding and connection, someone to lean on when the load gets to be a little too much, someone to sit on the couch with...sometimes its nice to do nothing with someone.

to use a recent quote from a movie...i am sucking the cock of karma this week in the parent dept...
all the shitty stuff i did as a kid, regardless of the fact i still feel much was justified, has come back to haunt me....it is disappointing and disheartening...this woman i nannied for once when i was 19 or 20 said something to me that ive never forgotten....that being a parent is a thankless job...truer words were never spoken.
thats all im saying on that topic.

i just ate thing full of gummy sour candies and i don't even like sour gummy candies.
i have tomorrow off....i am sleeping in...i am watching my loser daytime shows and then Aunty Leslie is coming over for dinner....and to hang out a little.

can not feel feet...must go get warm....

Sunday, September 07, 2008

Aunt Flow, you can just fuck the hell off...

Ohhh yes interviewing tomorrow form the permanent position spot at work, bright and early at 9 am, right smack in the middle of PMS time....my hands today feel like itchy balloons...my legs and feet are dead, headache....ohhh yeah im gunna be drugging myself up shortly. I spent the morning seeing off Mel, Kelly and baby Maddie, then fell asleep on the couch til noon (eek!) and have been working on my answers for tomorrows interview ever since. They are pretty much the same as last time so im not worried about it, i am smart enough to know its already decided if im getting the job or not so if I do not I will be rather mortified and promptly looking elsewhere within gov't before my January 2009 auxiliary position is done.

Last night me, Mel, Kelly and Marc went to see the Pineapple Express again...again for me, they were virgins. Gawd i laughed......and laughed....the quotes from that movie....


War is upon you! Prepare to suck the cock of karma!
~
Angie, you're a fucking idiot. I say that with love.
~

Saul
: Just sit back and get ready to enjoy some of the rarest weed known to mankind. [he lights a joint and inhales]
Dale Denton: It's really that rare?
Saul: [exhales] It's, like, the rarest. [he examines the joint] Saul: It's almost a shame to smoke it. It's like killing a unicorn...with, like, a bomb.
~
Red: [points to his armpits] You see these? There's no hair under here, bro.
Dale Denton
: What is the significance of that?
Red
: It means I'm aerodynamic when I fight.
~

Saul: [telling Dale to smell Pineapple Express] It's like God's vagina!
~
Red: [Red regains consciousness after shortly passing out from his wounds] I'm like the nerd at the sleepover who fell asleep at nine.
Dale Denton: It's okay. We won't put our dicks in your mouth.
~
I am so sluggish today.. I think tara is supposed to come over tonight but i dont recall....I will be a bundle of FUN! hahahaha

Thursday, September 04, 2008

suck it...

apparently im a gramma and must go to bed at 10-1030 to not feel like a sac o' poo in the morning.
 
fucking great.

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

i hate the bus


I hate the bus when school is in...
This morning between students, and mothers with fucking strollers taking up 40 seats each and stupid ppl in general they should all be glad there wasn't a fucking blood bath. I especially love the ones who just wont move twds the back of the bus as it fills...i had my headphones on and this spaced-out looking twat would not budge until i yelled at her..."Do you think you could MOVE?" Do u need a fucking written instruction book to follow obvious bus protocol you stunned fucking cunt (oooo c word alert...) omg...I got off the bus early to escape the stupidity...I will give it one more shot tomorrow and if its gunna be like that everyday i think i am just gunna leave earlier and walk the 40 mins and enjoy the solace of not being on a crowded bus.

Same thing trying to get home...when a bus finally did show up (i waited 35 mins for a bus that is scheduled to come every 15) there were 398475983475983475983475 ppl at every stop so i was forced to sit by this crazy fucking lady...i was listening to a Matt Good/Tony Peirce podcast and this old freaky lady was ranting about the bus driver being a liar, and how the bus was LATE and how shes gunna complain to the phone company about it (wtf?)...go at it girlfriend...
the bus was full of Asian students and they all seemed oblivious to the bus protocol as well...."Excuse me" is code for MOVE OR I WILL FUCKING PUNCH U IN THE THROAT.

Work was its usual bs self...the politics are really starting to become apparent now and i refuse to partake...i just don't care enough...not only is this job unfulfilling on many levels im just there for a pay chq so....whatever.
Once i have mastered this job I will be moving on to a different dept/ministry.

After work i strolled downtown to the post office to mail a package...HA HA HA the guy in front of me was sending a GIANT moving sized box to the UK....so i was listening to see what they charged him cuz mine was so much smaller....yeah 120.00 surface and that takes 38475983475 yrs or 250.00 for 1 week.
I near shit my pants for that poor bastard...
Til it was my turn...they wanted 80.00 for mine....JESUS CHRISTTTTTTTTTTTTT...the guy was nice enough to tell me to take it home and split it up so it would go as a small package...so thats my goal tonight...split it up into 2 and it should be cheaper. Fucking robbing bastards.

Can u tell im in a shit mood? Yeah, I am. I blame the cunt on the bus this morning...oh and the fact my direct supervisor is a useless turd. When I have Q's I like to spread em around so I am not overwhelming one person etc...but I am not going to my s'visor again unless im desperate bc she sends me on wild fucking goose chases that end up being irrelevant to my initial question...If I go to the reg. staff I get much more direct answers and better training to boot. It is weird not being the boss...I don't wanna be in charge of anyone - don't get me wrong - but it is really weird.
Weirder not knowing everything either...haha What an egomaniac! Maybe i should be a boss again just in a different field...where I am not working with idiots...but really...how realistic is that? ha!

Ive been anally raped and violated by the school fees rolling in...and its just begun for the love of gawd! I am not sure *free education* is the correct terminology anymore. She seems to like her new school so far...has kids she knows in most of her classes so shes not a loner...except in english but thats not too bad...

I made some weird bean creation for dinner tonight...should make 4 an interesting day tomorrow...that will be my BUS REVENGE MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Did i tell u guys the shit Shawn made me listen to on the trip to PR? 1st it was some hideous gangsta rap crap...then some hideous new zealand pop music...they he had a learn to speak french cd in...i can not tell you how fucking putrid that was....
on that note....good night folks!

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

my foot in the appropriate place....

Well...I was thinking about it...I don't foresee another wedding in my near future...seeing that I assume Ayla will have the sense to wait that out for quite some time...

Today was another day at work...nothing life changing. Ayla's 1st day in HIGH SCHOOL (OOH LA LA) went well today...she's happy with the classes she got and the ppl in them...loves the new school and the "grown up-ness" of it. We bbq'd little pork chops in teriyaki tonight for dinner with a salad, she thought she was eating LAMB for some reason which puzzles me as to why she ate it willingly...BARF!
Eating lamb is up there with eating rabbit and possum...why would you if there is pig and chicken available?

Why is it so hard to find a clicky keyboard nowadays? I mean i don't want to pay 80.00 for a friggin keyboard with high keys...theres NO fucking reason they cant sell 20.00 versions with high clicky keys....you don't get it ~ do you? Well im not gunna explain the intricate workings of my keyboard needs here with all you clueless bastards so just forget it...Ayla gets it, thats all that matters. If anyone has a black clicky high keyed keyboard wit intact little elevation feet they dont want ill trade it for the 20.00 brand new Microsoft one i just bought that has flat keys.



- Damien Rice Lyrics

Monday, September 01, 2008

Weekend Wedding

Ohhh Maddie...how can u look so cute and not be eaten by everyone around you?
I basically took pictures of my kid and Maddie ALL weekend bc I couldn't stop looking at either of them....Maggie (bride) and Kelly (my cousin, sister of bride) looked rather stunning as well...their hair and make up was fab...and so relaxed...one good point about having an evening wedding is you have the whole day to prep and not spazz out.


Maggie and David and helper Maddie going through the loot!





My stunning offspring....


Maggie & David, bride n groom


mmmmmmm cake!!!!!!!!!


Erika & Matt


Maddie and Ayla...spinningggggggggggggg





Ayla DESPISED her dress but we ALL thought she looked lovely in it so shut up Ayla!


Lovely Kelly...being a goon!


Shawn & Ayla...does it look like Shawn has a bottle of wine in his jacket??? That time i dont think he did but....more on that later hahah