EFF IT

Nov 2 2009

Wow...day 1 of the “Re-Org” and I can assure you there is nothing organized about anything going on here...NOTHING.

And if one more person comes around offering me Halloween candy I may have to use my desk scissors to cut their heads off.

I am a breath of fresh air aren’t I? It has become obvious to me that it is imperative I like the job I am doing or I am a miserable asshole. I cannot imagine doing a job you hated for very long...Once I get to that place I am pretty much done and move on...

Aside from that...here is what else is going on. My biceps are so sore still from the move that the act of eating causes me extreme pain which is kinda funny. One arm is so bruised it looks like I was man handled by one of my pretend husbands....lifting things is not to be taken for granted either...oddly enough...muscle pain, sun burns and wounds...anything hideous really is strangely enjoyable to me...I dunno what that means about me but...whatever. So long as it is not nerve pain...::shiver::

Arika met William Katt this weekend...The Greatest American Hero...I loved that show as a kid! She said he was pretty friendly...he isn’t Rick Springfield but...still pretty cool anyway.

On Friday Hawt Brian (Andrea’s Conquest) held a pretend gun to my head and asked me what my last words were...I had had a few drinks at that point...and do you wanna know what wisdom I came up with...? Yeah it is inspiring alright... “I LOVE YOU RICK SPRINGFIELD!” Yeah...wtf. Loser face.

Have I mentioned I hate it here @ work? Oh yes I did ...moving on. Ok not moving on...just place me SOMEWHERE...anywhere...I will fling mashed potatoes at a gov’t facility...I will mop floors...I will file...I will fetch coffee and do mindless errands...I am not above doing something completely beneath me. (That was a funny sentence to type and read)

I nearly got hit by a lady in an SUV this morning as I was trying to use the crosswalk...that was awesome...the only thing that made it remotely fun was the look of complete horror on her face and her apologetic mouthing of IM SOOO SORRY 800x in a row. If she had hit me I could have not come to work today – THAT BITCH!!!!!!

LET IT BE KNOWN FAR & WIDE that Regan Keil has promised to do a strip tease for me next time I am in PR...Kelly and I will eagerly await this show in Maggie’s living room...5 and 10 dollar bills in hand for tipping purposes. I look forward to his Justin Timberlake-like dance moves and strong physique exposed and oiled up.

Uh oh...coma is kicking in...need nap – STAT! Must...sta..y...a..w.a..ke.........when I eat lunch in a half hour listen very carefully and no matter where you live u will hear me snoring.

{insert time-warp here}

Ok...let’s see how long it takes for the coma to set in.

REAL CONVERSATION: what do you make of this Olympic stuff? The media spin is insane...and I realize a lot of people are fans of SPORT and it feels patriotic to them somehow...I mean ppl were openly weeping watching prior Olympic footage at the opening ceremony on Friday which blew my mind...ppl had themselves and their families rigged up in full on Olympic 2010 gear – shirts, hats, mitts, sweaters...it was like Christmas somehow...I stood around watching all this glee and did not understand it...b/c all I can see are misplaced priorities and a serious waste of $ that could be used to actually HELP ppl who need it in some capacity.

So...all you sports folks who are loving this...explain it to me...what makes you see it as something positive while I can find nothing positive about it? Honestly, until it came to BC I hadn’t really thought about it before...the cost...the implications...the waste...I am not a huge sports fan but I have in the past watched the Olympics...diving mostly (hahaha) and figure skating (yes I am a gay man, why do you ask?)...but I just don’t get the intense LOVE for it all...
I really liked Guy’s blurb about funding this event so athletes can achieve their dreams & goals...lots of people have dreams & goals and why is it they don’t get it funded via the gov’t/taxpayer dollars? And really...when people are homeless and hungry are funding games really a priority? Clearly they are for a lot of people...and that I just do not understand.

http://www.matthewgood.org/2009/11/i-wish-my-last-name-had-been-smith/
Here is my Matthew Good plug 4 the day...

Ok....seriousness over...its 1:45 now. I have not lapsed into a coma. Yippee. Alex with Smaller Boobies just got herself a lovely boyfriend...and he sounds divine...all caretaker-y and nice...wtf! What an anomaly... I love stories like this...it gives me hope in the universe. (And I am naive enough to just stay thinking it is a permanent male attribute) I always end up being the caretaker-y person in relationships...believe it or not, despite my rage and uncaring caustic wit, I actually like taking care of people...but I am not a fucking martyr and don’t want to be the only person in the union doing shit like that. Christ, I could stay single in my current situation if I wanted to feel used and unappreciated...ha! (Motherhood is fabulous!)

I didn’t get to lunch with Thomas Sunday b/c of kid germs and the fact he is still in Manitoba...I am sure he is thrilled out of his mind.