Fuck You Friday

Ohhh it is FUCK YOU FRIDAY here in my head...as well as REMEMBER REMEMBER the 5th of NOVEMBER...oooh yes what a day it is indeed. After work I have some errands to run so by the time Iget home I will be ready to sit on my couch and put on V for VENDETTA and get lost in that movie for a few hours.

I am right off my fucking rocker today....”some” say I am premenopausal and should practice better parenting while I say how about you go fuck yourself. That’s right Ayla you teenage self absorbed monster – go fuck yourself. A human being can only take so much before you just get too tired to try anymore. Being accommodating and nice and trying to be “chill” about shit that bugs the shit out of me can only last so long when you are consistently shit on, lied to and taken advantage of so yeah... premenopausal, premenstrual, cranky, tired, weary or whatever other word you wanna use to try and shift blame away from yourself – call it what you will – I call it fed up and done tip toeing. Let’s see how it feels for her to get treated how she treats me. She won’t fucking like it anymore than I do.

With that said and done...tomorrow night we are having the Raging Lesbos over for snacks and Wii...then Sunday I am doing lunch with Lisa & Jackie...and a movie too I think. I will be done my Rick Springfield Memoir by tomorrow sadly...kinda wanted it to go on and on but...I lose. I quite enjoyed it...mentally referring to his life circumstances to mine......being that he’s over 20 yrs older it’s so funny to know in his 30s while I was 11 and wanted to marry him he was going through a pile of stuff...

The job I was hopeful for looks to be dead in the water – they have reposted 2 of the positions and seeing that 3 were available when I applied they clearly only hired 1 person and I haven’t heard shit so....do the math. I pretty much did a mental internal snap upon realizing that and just became instantly done. Told my current boss to go ahead and make this job thing go permanent if she can despite my misgivings...there are some cool perks: great office vibe and 3 good ladies to work with, flexibility and freedom for scheduling etc...but FUCK I hate the location and the distance it is (too far to walk for this fatty) and the bldg is a pile of shit.....TOO HOT ALL THE DAMN TIME. U might think those things are no big deal but 4 me they are huge. It is demoralizing x 3894758347583745 to walk into a scorching hot bldg every morning and sit in HEAT all winter as fans roar and the windows are cranked open...its fucking ridiculous. Plus this job is a fine job but it isn’t taking me anywhere and I have already maxed out the challenge aspect of it at the 6 mth mark sadly.

Fuck is the word of my day apparently...