Tuesday, June 14, 2011

YESTERDAY: I think I have fixed my shoe trauma. I tried to post a big long thing about my shoe/foot trauma but Blogger ate it....so fuck you Blogger...preventing me from gettin’ my whine on.

So anyway I have a terrible heel day and go to Walk in Comfort out of complete desperation Friday after work...I don’t have 2 dimes to rub together but I am desperate and willing to credit card any pair of shoes that will help me not die. I get there and explain what I have concluded...the Clarks are great BUT the sole so narrow I feel like I walk on skates and can’t really get a comfy sturdy walk going...so I need to stick to lesbionic mens Merrell shoes...so I explain my plight to this guy...now this guy...I have talked with him before...he is tall, and wearing really tight dress pants and tight dress shirt...it reminded me of disco...know what I mean? He has a slight Scottish or Irish accent...and he is VERY sure of himself...he sits me down and measures my foot...this has never happened to me before...he goes me the shoes...sits me down and puts them on me, ties them for me...I admit...it made me kinda moist...the take charge shoe guy tied my gawd damn shoes for me without asking for a blow job or any other form of payment! IT’S AMAZING! I am thinking of sending a thank you card.

Needless to say I bought the shoes...I think at that point if he had tied snow shoes to me feet and claimed they would make my heel better I would have bought them. They kick ass though...my heel was instantly feeling less hideous and I iced the crap out of it all weekend and stayed off it mostly and today I am back to it being half decent.

Saturday Lisa & I went to a gay-raj sale...I scored a cd, a book and a stool all for 5 bucks. I am fond of the stool. It is white and I may so dome hideous arts and craftsy thing to it. I then carried on my day later and went to Alex’s place to make punk rock tutus. I now KNOW how to make tutus. I feel like I should add this to my resume and really milk it 4 all it’s worth...I have a little cousin Madelyn who I am considering making one for her birthday...I mean I can make her a HORSE-THEMED TuTu and I will be her favourite aunty for 5 mins!!

New windows this week...SOOOO excited to have new fancy windows that have screens and they all open! WOOHOO!!! Dunno if the bldg owner won the lotto or what but I dig it...maybe if I hang in long enough I will get a new patio door...or kitchen cupboards that are not old, disgusting and falling apart... (Ohhh one can dream.)

I am deeking work a little early to ensure I get home in time for Game 6. The dementia still hasn’t passed...I am totally into this play off shit...I really hope they win tonight b/c I cannot deal with the stress of it all! I think next season when hockey starts up I won’t really care about it again...I think I am one of those play off whores who just watches once it’s really awesome....not a hardcore watch every game all season fan.

TODAY: Ok it is now the day after Game 6 and the Canucks were raped again violently. Game 7 is tomorrow night....HUMP DAY...please please please universe let the Canucks not get bent over a log and raped hard again...I can say honestly I am a little worried that if they don’t win the cup on their own turf the downtown Vancouver crowd is going to embarrass us with retard antics.

Moving on...I have decided to make Miss Madelyn a Horsey Tutu for her upcoming birthday...having just learned how to make tutus via the Awesome Alexandra I was instantly struck with a vision to make one with little horsey charms etc for Miss M. b/c she is HORSE crazy and is coincidentally having a Horsey Themed b’day this year...

I am my own hair cutter. I just cut my own hair and gawd dammit I like it more than the last 3 haircuts I paid out the ass for. If u recall my last hair cut was March 2010 where I was violated and raped at the Shampoo Hair Bar. That’s right over a year later I am still traumatized and bitter...and I haven’t gone in for a haircut since. I do wish my hairdresser friends Laura and Adele would move here...and save me from myself lol Anyhow I really needed a buncha dead dry hair cut off so I just went to town and cut a few inches off and TAADAAA! All good...no trauma...no sad story to report.

The Gallbladder people called me...They have an open date at the end of July...so I am gunna talk to my boss today and confirm with the surgeon. I am a tard and watched a gallbladder operation on youtube last night...I didn’t realize its kinda stuck to the liver so its gotta be peeled/burned off kind...quite grody...I have many reservations but I am just gunna do it b/c I don’t want the threat of a gallbladder attack hanging over my head the rest of my life...it hasn’t bugged me in a year but as soon as I start exercising and eating good it gets stupid sensitive and causes me all sortsa grief so...screw it...BEGONE GALLBLADDER...just watch I will be one of those friggin ppl who gets a life time of the trots from this operation......GAWDDDDD THAT WOULD SUCK.


Adele said...

This is the 3rd time in the last few days that you've made reference to me and Victoria. You're killing me! Kinda like hanging a necklace made of Skor bars around my neck and telling me I'm not allowed to eat 'em!

Adele said...

I am however relieved that you're finally getting that nasty little organ removed! I'll never forget the color of your skin when you were having that attack!!! GAWD!!!

~Jen~ said...

what can I say - Id love it if u livedhere?! lol

yeah sorry about that...100% unplanned...that was a bad one...nice to know its not all in my head and u could tell i wasnt being dramatic.

Adele said...

YEP! I'd move there in a heartbeat! Maybe someday...

Ohhh...when you said the attacks were horrifically painful before I witnessed it, I believed you!!! You're one tough chick!