Thursday, September 08, 2011

All child pervs should die

I gotta say the recent Amber Alert looking for the 3 yr old ginger kid of cuteness from Sparwood, BC is rather disturbing...imagine waking up to find your kid GONE. At 1st you would think he was in the living room or hiding or something but it wouldn’t take long for that disgusting feeling to overtake you realizing he was actually missing. Absolute horror. Now that they are also looking for the creepiest, heinous looking freak I have seen in a while one can only imagine the mindfuck thinking that greasy inbred with perv tendencies has your toddler. Fuck. I just do not even know how you WAIT to find out what has happened.

In other news...ok not really but...how about this summer weather hey? You know how I just LOVE the sweaty boobness of 28 degrees...oh yeah just great...but victory shall be mine...the weather will turn and turn in my favour it shall – back to the cool, damp wonderfulness that I enjoy 8ish months of the year. MuHahahaHAHahahHAHHAHAHAA. Seriously though – if not for this welfare a/c at work I might die but the a/c changed my life...work life that is...even though by 2-3 pm it struggles to keep up and can only cool the room to 78 degrees that is a SHITLOAD better than prior to its installation I can assure you...it’s a good 20+ degrees hotter in here without it on so just in case I haven’t told the a/c how much I love it lately.......I LOVE YOU A/C!

American Pickers is my new favourite show...I like it better than Canadian Pickers...the American Picker guys are more likable to me, funnier...though I do like seeing the Canadian stuff the Canadian Pickers find...I am all about HGTV these days...House Hunters, Property Virgins, Rental Income, Holmes on Holmes...my gawd...men with hammers and such...oh my. Mike Holmes should come over for a sleep over.

Better yet send that bushy faced Liam Finn over for a sleep over...I am having a serious love affair with his music at the moment. I will spare you the gory, moist details and just say I am happy to add him to my Pretend Boyfriend list. As it turns out I prefer PRETEND BOYFRIENDS to real ones. I have decided the only way a relationship will ever work for me is if there is a serious level of intimacy and real, genuine friendship involved with a person with balls who can call me on my bully bullshit and respect the fact that the way I do shit is the way it will be done in my house. Is that too much to ask? Seriously...my neurotic brain needs a special sort of someone who can actually talk and articulate shit and get in my face without being confrontational....yes that is possible...I must be outwitted delicately...b/c if you get in my face for real without any sort of plan or procedure I will ruin you ~ you will lose. Ask anyone who knows me. I am a gawd damn machine. Vicious. Badger. Terrorist. Ha ha ha aaaaa

Mmmm lunch. Daal and brown rice and carrot sticks. Jealous aren’t you? I would rather be eating fish & chips truth be told. Some asshole got on the bus with fish & chips yesterday and I nearly had a convulsion. All I could smell was grease, salt and vinegar and it was bloody awesome. Rude.

5 comments:

Abu Anka said...

I like the sounds of that challenge.

~Jen~ said...

you are married...u are out of the running

Cyndy said...

I jones for the Yard Crasher guy. Quinn said he would blow him too if he came over and did our backyard.

~Jen~ said...

Ohhh Quinn hahahahaha

Abu Anka said...

Fun ruiner....