Wednesday, February 17, 2010

o-m-f-g

I rarely get busted for things but tonight I got super busted by my kid...gawd...its so funny but fucked up beyond my comprehension...

Today I was at Old Nick's (head shop) and came across these containers...air tight containers so your weed doesn't reek...I am bothered that my kid is a dolt and carries weed around that reeks...cuz if I can smell it so can anyone else, esp her friends parents etc (GAWD!) so....I grab 2 of these containers and figure im gunna hide em in her room all stealth like, she wont ask me if I left them there cuz that would be dumb...i figure she will assume a friend left them or whatever and use them to avoid reeking like a drug dealer. I don't wanna hand em to her cuz then its like im condoning her stupidity.

So she leaves tonight and I wait to make sure shes gone.....and I get these containers and go into her room (the door was closed so I shut the door behind me to ensure the cat didn't get in and fuck her shit up)...I toss these things into her closet and as I am leaving I hear her come in the front door...FUCK!!!!!! (Front door is RIGHT where her bedroom door is) I have NOWHERE TO GO!! IM BUSTED! Not even Macgyver could save me! So I am standing there shitting and she has NO idea im in her room but shes about to come in and I say HI through the closed door....and then its quiet as she registers where my voice is coming from...im thinking fuck im soooo BUSTED! Then the ranting starts...she gets QUITE upset and im sure its not helping that im smiling b/c I know im a dead and guilty as fuck...so I try telling her I was just giving her something that i didn't want her to know I was giving her which just makes her more pissed off cuz it doesn't make sense and she thinks im just weaseling out of me getting busted snooping in her shit which i wasn't even doing!!

ARGG! So she is screaming, im grinning like a dumbass fool b/c im not accustomed to getting busted EVER....so I just say "when u find it you'll know what i am talking about" and I leave the war zone....20 mins later...I hear this loud laughing and omg omg omg laugh laugh laugh and she comes ripping outta her room and says *omg mom you LOVE it that i smoke weed don't u!!??? U SECRETLY LOVE IT!!!!!* I'm like WHAT!!??? I have no idea why she thinks that....lol Anyway after she mocked me for a while I told her to leave me alone b/c I was embarrassed. Fuck. So much for being stealth.

5 comments:

Barbara Bruederlin said...

hahaha! I love the way you two communicate!

Cathy said...

Oh you dumb ass, you should have waited longer....have I taught you nothing all these years... or if you do have to go in in a hurry take the plunger or something and say you heard her toilet running...I used to carry a pile of folded clothes and say I was just putting them on his bed...ahahahaha you are condoning the pot smoking...let her get caught...it might scare her enough to quit.

Conky said...

ok i own the dumb ass title...i always USUALLY deadbolt the door and i dunno why i didnt!!!

donna immediately thought i should have went and at on her toilet and pretended to be taking a shit hahahahaa that would have worked lol fuck!

cathy...thing is HERE as opposed to other places in canada you do not get arrested for carrying pot unless its a large amount considered to be SELLABLE...it is decriminalized here to the point she is not going to get arrested...they smoke weed on street corners here...no one cares and the cops do not do shit unless you are driving or selling or growing...thats it...so...theres no condoning at all - for real...i didnt breastfeed that kid for 4 yrs so she could now ruin all those beautiful breast-milk brain synapses!!!!!

exnihlo said...

I'm 100% conflicted on this entire topic.

But what else is new.

Maureen said...

you should have taken her to the head shop with you - she would have been so embarrassed to be there with mom she would at least try to hide it :)