you are lucky I don't own a sword...

It is not every day that you name your kid after a character in a book...with that said....while I am nearing the end of the 6th & last book to date in the Jean M. Auel Earth's Children series - a certain EVENT that happened to my beloved A.y.l.a. in the book made me so angry and sick that I was shocked at how I was reacting to words on a page. Betrayal...even literary betrayal...sickens me...Jondalar...you are an ASSHOLE of EPIC GAPE! Arrrg!

Aside from that horrific book story that I am CLEARLY far too involved in – HAPPY BIRTHDAY AUNTY CATHY! Lotsa birthdays coming up now...the next few months are like a cluster of birthdays...

Grad is but a fond memory...The dress will be sent back to Deanna this weekend...Ayla was at the dinner/dance less than an hour when someone spilled punch all.over.her...it came out mostly but needs a proper cleaning and Deanna is handling it as they may donate it to the Cinderella Project anyhow so it would get cleaned then. (Awesome idea by the way Ms Deanna!!) Pam and Jim are coming to town again this Friday...Pam is getting her old school 80s Pegasus Unicorn tattoo covered up with a new shmancy SLEEVE of owl, snake and craggy tree goodness! Saturday is her 1st appointment...outline only...ouch ouch ouch...outline is the worst. This enables me a nice mellow visit with her and Jim which will be a treat...AND HENRY ROLLINS THIS FRIDAY with Alex & Sarah....will be a blast of course...

Maggie, David and Sid and Pam will be down again June 29...which is awesome...Pam gets her 2nd appointment of pain done and I get a visit on the long weekend...In between those visits Tere is coming to visit...it is like I am mega-popular or something suddenly...
During all of this I am proclaiming utter poverty and NOT.SPENDING.A.DIME b/c I have not a dime to spend hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I am going to start leaving my cards at home (which I know is going to annoy the shit out of me at certain times) and continue missing concerts (ie: Metallica in Vancouver, Roger Waters The Wall, Puscifer in Vancouver...missed em all...)

Have an appt. with the sports med doc in the morning re: the foot ultrasound I had done last week...I have LOW expectations...so if he has anything informative to offer I will be thrilled...but I fear it will be a useless interaction like the previous one. I guess I will just PIN him down and make him answer: if I walk on this foot like a mofo, like I need to, to be healthy etc. am I WRECKING it....??? If I am going to permanently wreck it so that even if I did lose weight I'd still be all crippled I want to know that before I change my game plan...guess i will find out or not find out tomorrow.

It is vengeance time...time to begin some sort of mindfuckery on someone incredibly deserving and worthy of getting played with a little. No one directly in my life but someone that I have been thinking about for nearly 7 mths...someone who during someone's lowest moment in life did some things that are deserving of some payback...this is not just every day, real life crap that ppl do...this is some heinous shit...stuff that makes you gasp when you hear about it...and like most pieces of shit he just carried on with his life as if nothing was wrong and like he is a good person...the extra kicker is he is a church leader...not that such hypocrisy is unusual...in fact it is almost normal nowadays but...b/c this has stayed with me for 7 mths and has become impossible to ignore...I feel it is my DUTY to try and exact a little justice in the name of the fallen and the people who were left to pick up the pieces...sounds dramatic doesn't it? I know...I am hoping to be able to do more than open 53 accounts for Columbia House in his name (do they still exist?) or order him some lovely Danbury Mint collectors plates – COD....but really...at this point in time I am willing to do anything even if it just inconveniences him a little...Fucker.

Graduation....

CLICK HERE

A grand success....woohoo!

Someone is in love....!!!

I am in love with this happy little xmas egg...

Little Madelyn is in love with her big cousin A. and cannot wait to come see her. next week for her graduation...

Prison looks good on some people...

Yesterday I bashed my elbow/funny bone so hard on the corner of my desk I thought instantly that I never want to break my elbow b/c it would be 100000x worse.

So I got a new cell phone...it didn’t cost me anything and the monthly plan is the exact same as my previous one so it seemed like a good idea to try a new smarty pants phone out...I like to think of myself as a technically minded person...but the 1^st few days were making me feel like I needed to go to Sylvan Learning Centre to take a damn course in how to use a smart phone. Anyhow....after a week I am on the ball though I still am awkward with it a little...I do miss the sturdiness of my old flip phone...but it is handy...though admittedly I spent more time playing DRAW SOMETHING than anything else...it is this game where I draw a picture of a specified word so that the person I send it to tried to guess by watching the playback of me drawing it...it is absolutely hilarious...I laugh re-watching my own drawings the most b/c they are so....CHILD-LIKE. Ha! Or...as I just did recently to poor Tara...I thought I was drawing for the word “DEPP” so I made all these Johnny Depp movie refs and totally kicked ass but the word was actually EARRING and my fat fingers picked the wrong one and well yeah....My DEPP drawing was wasted!!!!! I have about 25 games going...it is insane. It has replaced my Angry Birds fetish.

Glad Michael Rafferty was sentenced and the trial is over...I have been following that horrific story a little worried he would somehow weasel out of the rape/kidnapping/murder charges but thankfully he is off to a max prison somewhere....hopefully someone will take care of business and rid the world of him.  His statement on the CBC website was disturbing...he spend most of the statement trying to manipulate Tori Stafford’s mother to gain private audience with her so she can know ‘the truth’...yeah...right. Creep. Enjoy prison....child rapists are REALLY popular in jail.

DEAR THE PEOPLE. NO I DO NOT WANT TO JOIN WEIGHT WATCHERS WITH YOU. OR DO A FASTING CLEANSE. STOP ASKING ME. I AM NOT PAYING $ TO BECOME MORE OCD ABOUT FOOD. FUCK OFF. THE END. FOREVER MORE – JEN

9 days til GRADUATION...OMG!!

Doh!

Seeing as I cannot escape summer – YET AGAIN – I will do like last year and make a concentrated effort to be less shitty about it...that of course does not count if it goes over 27 degrees which is about 80 for my American friends....once we are in the 80’s I am fairly unhappy unless I am at home and naked or in a cotton nighty in front of the fan...waiting to die of heatstroke. BUT – until then...what the hell...I can’t kill the sun so I may as well enjoy the evil wench for 3 mins at a time. Being less negative is my new mandate...wish me luck (I mean that NON-sarcastically of course).

I started walking part way to work again...not because I enjoy being sweaty 1^st thing in the morning or enjoy the urban outdoors...but b/c it is rather obvious I will be a dbl leg amputee if I do not MOVE...and keep moving....being gargantuan is annoying...and when Connie is here in August and we go exploring Botanical Beach in Port Renfrew I would prefer it if I did not drop dead of a fucking heart attack at her feet.

I am looking fwd to our visit a fair bit...she is coming Aug 2...so we have the 3^rd-7^th to hang out...no kids...no obligations....nothing....it will be the only time since we were teenagers that we have done this...I booked us a room for a night in Port Renfrew so we can beach explore....and stay the night...other than that we are free agents...we will visit a pub or 2....hang at home and cook...eat some good food...visit other beaches around Victoria...it is going to be AWESOME!

Concerts this summer are all organized and set...June 1 is Henry Rollins...1^st week in July is Bill Maher...July 13 is Tragically Hip/Sam Roberts/Current Swell/Jets Overhead...I am tapped...I hope no one else comes over this way. Tere is coming over the 1^st weekend in March...I have organized it with Sarah the Crafting Goddess to make Tere’s 2 memorial quilts out of Taylor’s clothes...one is for her and one for Taylor’s dad. Such a sweet gift...and possession really...I feel surrounded by death – have felt this way for a long time...I seem to have a busted filter for screening the realities of life out in that regard...I think most ppl can go about their business not thinking/obsessing over death all around them...I cannot seem to shake it. Probably doesn’t help that I am an obsessive lunatic.

Jupiter's Cock!

Oh - Pardon me...I forgot I had a blog...that about 3 people read...my apologies.
I have been excruciatingly busy with many useless things: overeating, not exercising, watching a horrible series called SPARTACUS where the use of the word "cock" is as frequent as teenagers using "like" in a conversation...it amuses me...plus the men are hot as shit...what else...oh cleaning up camouflaged cat vomit off the carpet, working, avoiding socialization, preparing for A's grad May 25/26, oh and don't let me forget...DOODLING LIKE A CRAZY MOFO. There are other things but they are lost to me right now.

As I said previously I don't feel like writing...I am in midst of a "meh" period...indifference laced with apathy...about damn near everything. Even my new phone...I just took this picture of me blogging at this very moment - uploaded it to Flickr and then posted it here...OH HOW TECHNOLOGY IS SAVING US WRETCHED HUMANS! Haaaaa! I just spent 1 hour DLing free ringtones to match up with the ppl in my contact list...some of them cracked me up so much....like the screaming 300 one THIS IS SPARTAAAA" for Guy...etc...oh I am simply amused.

Anyhow...I have a horrible face at the moment - hormonal disfigurement...add that to the fact my eye is still on fire if I wear make up hence no eye make up makes me look like I just rolled outta bed....all.day.long. Tomorrow is Friday...MUSIC DAY! WOOHOO!

Here is my rant for the day...'friends' - glorious friends who love to give advice...unsolicited advice about dealing with shit & the importance of facing your problems - while they are swilling a drink like they are a newborn on a tit...in midst of the most heinous phase of their own life, wallowing in the dregs of pure relationship dysfunction, battling numerous demons...and "I" should deal with my issues...Uh...1st off...mind your business MR/MRS KNOW IT ALL...I am 100% in touch with my issues, dysfunctions, problems, and mental handicaps...I am all over it...I watch myself partake in my bad behavior as if I was standing across the room from myself...watching myself be a total asshole and do nothing about it...just observing...aware of EVERY shitty thing about me...I am far from deluded...I am not arrogant and so self important I have tricked myself into think I am fucking special...I am no better than anyone else even if I hate them - we are all the same worm food...so really...save your advice for some other empowering moment you are trying to achieve with someone b/c I am not hopping on board...ppl with the need for constant validation fucking tire me and make me want to cut myself.

The End.