BBQ WHORE

ok - propane scares me but I finally bit the bullet and bought a wee little table top bbq...I mean shit they are 17.00 now so....its hard to resist.

so after putting it together and wanting to DIE (I am not find of setting things up, esp things that have the potential to blow up in your face)...I struggled to get the propane tank on the damn thing...being that im SCARED of shit blowing up in my face and all I had a few calls...aunty pam and uncle jim assured me there is not trick...JUST SCREW IT ON....so i got it on.
Then I was too scared to start it up...cuz i think id look really bad w/o eyebrows...
Eventually after i did the LEAK TEST I started it up...

No explosion. YAY!

We had bbq steak (that resembled beef jerky, just how i like it) and bbq asparagus....mmmmmm

So yeah now I am the bbq queen...ill be bbq'ing cereal, soup, and toast now.
haaaaaa haaaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

lamma damma ding dong

Oooooooo hello on this fine cloudy cool saturday morning...

I have been rather unattached to this box of laziness lately...not to say i havent been lazy on my own - NEVER FEAR - but ive been neglecting my blogging duties, thats 4 sure...likely b/c I have fuck all of importance of excitement to say.

Ayla is in Vancouver right now with her old babysitter Ashley, they are going to movies, the PNE and shopping 4 school clothes...she went over there with a crap load of dough (600.00), took the bus all by herself (weep! weep!) and didnt get lost or stranded on the ferry! YAY! haha

She is having a good time b/c she is REALLY annoyed by my multiple calls per day asking her what shes doing haha

Afterwork im going out 4 dinner with T. and then meeting up later with some folks at Evolution...should be an interesting shit show. ha! I probably wont be out long and being sober will make me bored easily so....that is always safe.

I need to buy a hibachi....(sp?) I got my bonus...i paid for Aylas school crap and set some aside for some clothes for me b/c I am a god damn slob....and I gotta get a hibachi...i want BBQ'd meat dammit.

I had a dream about Matt Good last night...it was about his upcoming show here...it was quite funny b/c I was eating chicken that had been on the counter all day and didnt care about the possibility of the trots bc it was MATTHEW GOOD NIGHT!!!!!!!!! haha I also got tickets to the 2nd show in the dream so im kinda thinking thats a SIGN....a sign I should get a ticket to the 2nd show...just to be hardcore....go by myself....Ohhhh isnt that just proper stalker behaviour? ha ha h aah h hahahah hahaha In this dream he kept giving me dirty looks... ha hah ahahahaha and not the GOOD dirty looks either haha

Looks like I lose my assistant manager again in October....fuck.

I think I need to train POORLY or pick SHITHEADS b/c all my good ones get stolen from me as soon as I get em JUST RIGHT. :o( pout!

So how the fuck are all you guys?? Its been a while?!?!?! Update me!

Pardon me...while I burst into flames....

Brandon Boyd did not take his shirt off at all.

This shirt made me laugh

Don't u hate it when you're at a concert and you LOSE your tampon???

Donna the Beer Drinkin' Mosher

They didn't play PARDON ME...

At the end of the show I stood there for 10 mins in denial.

They never came back on to play it for me. RUDE.

Incubus sounded great...was a good show but gawd fucking dammit as if they didnt play PARDON ME. That made my boner soft.

Mmmmmmmm quail eggs are yummy.

check this out

Ayla has a girl sleeping over named Sarah....very polite etc...and I ordered them pizza last night...and asked what pizza she liked

J: do you like hawaiian?

S: Ohhhh no I can't eat that, theres ham on it

J: you hate ham?

S: no im jewish

J: oh (not understanding that whole pig thing)

J: what do you want then?

S: pepperoni

J: and what do u think thats made of? (I knew it was beef but pepperoni is like a hotdog u know, mystery meat so who knows right?)

S: ummmmmmm I am not sure....

A: MOM!!!!!!!

J: ha ha ha ha (pees her pants)

so then I order the pizza and what do they send???? pepperoni with SAUSAGE on it...I SHIT U NOT!!!!!!!!! im pretty sure thats PORK but am not 100% (wink wink) so I said nothing.

im going to jewish hell too!!!!!!!!!!! wooooooooooohooooooooooooooooo
im trying to behave in front of her...I chose to not play Mario Kart with them b/c I swear like a drunk trucker...

its my day off, its pissing rain and life is good.

girls are still asleep...the cops woke me up this morning...why they choose 8 pm on a sunday to make their calls is beyond me...another court date for work.
fuck i really hate that....such a waste of time and dick all happens at the end of it bc its the same assholes who try to keep on committing fraud....

Anyway....im going to yack to my aunty cathy now...hope church was a delight for your motherfuckers today. Tell Jesus I say HEY!

Ghetto Garage Sports Bar Party of 4

she was rapping as she was ping ponging if you can imagine...

Oooooo live action shot haha

mmmmmmmmmmm

its pink and i didnt vomit!

those little fucking onions are the devil....this morning i woke up and ALL I CAN TASTE IN MY MOUTH are those onions.....

Ghetto Garage Scenery

ghetto badminton

Lani's girl nails

just be happy im not posting her topless shot.

Darts was the most fun....4 retards with sharp ass darts in their hands is an inevitable good time though...

muffin top

I fucking hate it when I open a book and a giant full grown grand daddy silverfish comes at me....

I hate those things...Im gunna poison the fuckers again tomorrow.

Its sunday...im off to a bday party for a friend...should be fun, I hope she likes her gift bag MUAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

Ayla comes home tomorrow on the train...weather kinda sucked for camping this weekend but she said the surf lessons were fun...

Ive made 2 proper loaves of bread this weekend in the bread maker...it takes 983475893475934 yrs but man it smells good at the end! and then eating warm bread of course is bonerlicious.

Im kicking POP and ICE CREAM (aka cookie dough DQ blizzards) tomorrow.

My head is going to KILL me from caffeine withdrawls and nothing pleases me more than the cookie dough chunks in a beloved blizzard but...WHATEVER...gotta do whatcha gotta do.

Wonder how long ill last?

I am not good at this...at all.

I am gunna try to see if allowing myself 1 blizzard per week (SMALL) will appease my gluttonous nature.

Tylenol will be my best friend this month.

I am playing ping pong tonight and darts...with a buncha cut throats...should make 4 some good pictures.

I watched the HBO movie TSUNAMI today...gawd...how fucking sickening that the hotel co's stole the locals land after that and completely displaced them, and began rebuilding while dead bodies still littered the beaches...never saw that on the news. Twats.

Connie called me this weekend...that was a trip and a half. Fell back into the old fold of course...im not entirely sure how I feel about it all. She is married now and was here on the island recently to get married in ladysmith...

I can't believe it all really. It fucks with my mind.

I cant stop biting my nails...I have 2 left.

ARG!

girl you know its true....

I don't hear this NEAR ENOUGH but the words actually escaped Ayla's mouth repeatedly last night on the phone....YOU'RE THE BEST MOM IN THE WORLD....only takes 3 weeks away and her feeling ganged up on and I am the superstar! haha I give it 10 mins after shes home and I will irritate her again haha

ok maybe 1 day....

Anyhoo....its Friday...I get the weekend off...I am glad....Sat I will finish tiddling the house...Sun is Lani's birthday game/dinner night...I made her the best birthday gift bag...I used human hair of unnamed sources (NO ITS NOT PUBIC YOU SICK FUCKS) and had fun...although the crazy glue on my fingers actually hurts...as a kid it didn't hurt...oh the job of aging...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LANI!!!

Aunty Cathy and Robert are contemplating a move out west and I am thinking that is a COOOOOOL thing...Id love to have all my favorite aunties on the rock here!


The fam and Ayla are off on the way to Tofino today to camp and take surf lessons...gawd it sounds like a hoot really.

I hope its as fun as it should be for everyone...

omfg tourists are annoying, but not as much as children are

1st of all I can assure you no christian god was present at the museum today or he woulda made it flood to get rid of all the fucking idiots...

I dunno the purpose of this funky fork but I think it would make a fab weapon!

I wanna send this to Ayla & tell her I decorated her room while she was away

me at the beach....ok not really...


Cawwwww Cawwwwwww



i know I have ranted about the IRON CHINK before but it pisses me off still so I took a digital shot of it.....

Do u like my vegetation?? Im gunna see how big I can grow these sweet potato trees until the thing starts to ROT.

JIFFY POP! this thing was full of air and it totally looked like a giant jiffy pop!!!!!!

help me im meltingggggggggggggggggggg



Bahhhhhhhhhhhhh

So yeah...the exhibit was ok but the amount of ppl and whiney shithead kids pissed me off out of my mind....I think im done now with the museum...thats the 3rd exhibit Ive gone to and have left feeling like it isnt worth the 26.00, I'd be happier reading a good book with pictures included.

Sniff It Good!

Sometimes I walk past someone who smells of patchouli and I stop and INHALE deeply....

I had a dream about Bryan Adams the other night...NO IDEA where that came from. I blame the canker sore...its making me delerious.

I have today and tomorrow off and my store just got audited and we ROCKED IT....only missed 3 things....which is an improvement over last time...woohoooo

I have laundry on the go....I have been wearing clothes that needed a good washing a week ago...sexy i know...just add more perfume.

Tomorrow im hitting the museum and the imax for the titanic exhibit....I have a boner 4 that...been wanting to go since it got here...

11 40 PM: I was bamboozled by a gay man today....Shawn tricked me into hugging him and then tricked me in to coming to his house and not telling me he was having ppl over for his birthday.
Needless to say I was rather peeved

I didnt stay long...but then I went to play some ghetto badminton with Ardene...and ate some refried beans and came home...no one can out party this hardcore wench.

Im going to bed bc im sure Tracey will be making the museum an 8 hr trek tomorrow hahaha

She is making moola and sitting purdy....

Spot the DANG-er!!!!!! woot! woot!

Nice way to lose an eye dork!

This few weeks has gone by so fast it doesnt seem like its half over already...over meaning MY KIDLESS time...last summer at this time i was being a hussy so maybe that is why...when u work/sleep/partake in completely innocent activity things are less noteworthy.

I have been NAPPING too much as well haha its making me get up stupidly early in the monring which is rather annoying....I have a few busy days ahead of me at work so that should keep me ALERT...one would hope anyway.

Ayla got a night to herself last night....she was dieing for some MSN time and alone time...I think she may get it now when im freaking out about getting no alone time...when im at work im around ppl....when i come home she is usually here with her friends so sometimes i just wanna be BY MY DAMN SELF...do my own thing...

I really gotta get some food in here...well not that I would cook it mind u...i havent cooked shit all in forever, living off popcorn and sushi.

The new MG cd is orgasmically pleasing in a plethora of ways...I dunno how anyone can say his solo work is inferior to MGB material. They must be stunted to think so.

His Canada AM interview was very telling...I love the FABULOUS ex-wife burns, done so casually its easy to not notice...truly, it makes my thighs quiver...im not even exaggerating...Bonerlicious.

Champions of Nothing...*falls on floor in a bliss coma*...bloody hell...

dried up dead jelly fish fun

LOOK! Dugan is an awesome swimmer already!