Ohhh yay!

Look at me...im indoors and its Halloween! Ayla's out with Dylan and some other responsible adult who is not ME (WEEEEE)...shes called about 3x and sounds like shes having a blast...much better time than if I was there wrecking her chi!

It is fucking NIPPLEY out now....the heat is on full force...much to Ayla's delight...
IT'S SWEATER TIME!!!!

Bob Barker is RETIRING!!! Rude!

I went into the local *new* sex store this week! FUCKING AWESOME! u know candy necklaces? u can buy girl bikini's make of candy or guys g-strings... muhaha hahaha haha haha squishy titties...penis straws...boobie pasta...penis pasta...all sortsa cool shit...i know where im doing all my xmas shopping...
This year im just making cards...and then sending a goodie box to Aunty Cathy and sister Kim...
So aside from Mz Ayla & Maddie, thats it...takes the pressure off alright...
I really detest xmas, aside from the purdy lights.

Oooooh Ayla just got in with the MOTHERLOAD of chocolate blissfulness...good score grrl. I gt all the ones she hates....Coffee Crisp...Wonderbar...Crispy Crunch...Glossette PeaNuts etc ... oink oink oink!

Daylight Savings Time

Some of u who know me know that I have a bitch of a time wrapping my head around Daylight Savings Time....I *get* the concept....im not a complete tard...but i obsessive compulsively fuck myself up obsessing over TIME if i let myself....did i lose an hour or sleep or gain? if its 9 pm now its REALLY 10 PM so when i get up at 5 am its really 6 am....etc etc....on and on...so I made a rule yrs ago to NOT think about it....i change all the clocks and REFUSE to think about it again....if I feel my mind wandering there after looking at the time I have a hairy coniption in my head and violently SQUISH the thoughts out of my mind and think about ANYTHING else...anything until it passes....

I think this problem stems from my not having ever received a drop of breastmilk as an infant hahahha thats the excuse im going with anyway...
I have similar problems with other things too...maybe it was the beatings?? eating lead paint chips off the window sill?

My feet are FREEZING right now....im gunna bail myself in the bath...ive finally had to start using the heat...ugh
Aylas already asleep....she was lippy and lost her computer time tonight so she was SOOOOOO bored out of her mind she fell asleep hahahha dork.

Shit tomorrow is the 31st...crazy day at work...month end...AND HALLOWEEN....its gunna be a freakshow. ugh I have no idea if staff were allowed to dress up - i dont recall a corporate email stating otherwise so I said SURRRRRRRREE.......should be interesting....

Ryan McMahon & Bathroom Wall Art

gawd....

LIVE SNIPPET of Ryan McMahon CLICK HERE!!!Logan's has the best bathroom wall art....

whew....

ok thank fuck that template business is over....

so this is like having a new apartment sort of....the halloween colors are a coinkidink by the way...

Ayla is off making beaded jewelry and then going to a movie/birthday party....then its time to tart up for the Much Music Video Dance Party wooooohoooooooo

This is another year I wont get to go see Rocky Horror....the kids dance is done at 11 pm right when the flick starts so....maybe Halloween Night...

Gawd this crazy freak was at work today and had a $5.00 fake bill so it was confiscated/police were called and she lost her fucking marbles....CH News was hot on the scene within an hour about this TRAVESTY OF JUSTICE {insert eyeroll here} and its been a big freak show since....good gawd I spoke to this woman (keep in mind its my day off) and shes a nutjob.
Donna and I are going to see Running with Scissors this afternoon wooohooo....yay! I loved that book and I know the movie is gunna be a hoot.

Maybe the englishman will come over tonight....dunno...I havent been waking up feeling very good lately...I feel like an 80 yr old lady who was hit by a train 3x. Neck is SOOOOO still in the mornings it makes me wanna cut my head off.

Yay!

Ok im done...ive spent far too much time doing this....
im gunna go find a better template 4 Kelly too...cuz i dont like how his comments look on the one he has now....

where's the liquor cabinet?

im messing with my template....
ill finish tomorrow....
im tired.

Friday = Fried Egg Day

Ayla has more plans than I do this weekend.....1 rock climbing birthday party...1 regular birthday party...1 Much Music Video Dance Party....2 sleepovers...bloody hell.
Since shes gunna be so busy im gunna go see Rocky Horror Picture Show this weekend....ive not ever seen it at a theatre so im looking fwd to all the audience participation he heh eeehehehe
Ryan McMahon is Sunday as well...everyone jammed on me on that one so im probably gunna go solo...Ohhh the JOY....
I think Sat. will be the Shagging Englishman Extravaganza....

Parent/Teacher interview yesterday was fab....Ayla midway through the term is all A's and one high B....gotta love it...teacher says she speaks flawless french and just needs to participate some more in class...also said shes polite, pleasant and lovely to be around. Fuck - dont I get ripped off at home? ha ha ha Nice to know she has manners in public haha

Im making Krap Dinner for breakfast.

set a pew or 2 on fire

he he he i put old man gay porn (sorta) on Kelly the FireGuy's blog...muhahahaha

love n rockets

LOOK MAUREEN its Sebastian Bach as Jesus in Jesus Christ Super Star on stage......FUCK ME id start going to church if he was the person i was trying 2 impress.... --->

remember that love n rockets tune....and the band played on (BALL OF CONFUSION).....
this is my mantra to that song: AND THE JEN RAGED ON....-insert cool guitar here-
it will pass....it must b/c its contagious at work and im making everyone in a pissy mood...and i HATE that a lot....

Aylas at a halloween wing-ding at the moment...the englishman will be over later and boy is he in 4 it...

A certain friend of mine took a step recently doing something they were not entirely comfortable with and today it turns out theres a bit of good news in regards to this thing they did and although im not naming names or naming the step taken I just wanna say
YAY!!!!!!
and also....i dunno about anyone else but im LOVING Matty G's art work as of late.....its VERY telling and revealing but most importantly its so honest in its anger and emotion that its actually inspiring...how hard is it as a non celeb to get dumped and fucked up the ass via divorce minus the lube when u dont have the world watching and ppl judging u on such a grand scale....but to be scrutinized and bitched at bc ppl think yer a whiner/self pitier/bitter asshole....fuck u all...i love it that hes blurting his shit out and calling that skank out like she deserves....YEAHHHHH ooooooo look my own rage slipped out hahahahahahahhaha

pfffft

gawd i hate dreaming about old boyfriends....old boyfriends you'd sooner run over than ever talk to let along dream about all night.... *vomit*

I hear some cornflakes calling my name...

Wow look how chatty I am...*eye roll*

yeah I know...

sophia coppola is a crap movie maker.
marie antoinette was a disappointment....i blame sophia.

im going to bed to read sylvia plath poetry...

a look back....

I wish this hat was still around


He was happy there...
Ohhh Yoda....

this is the only fully naked picture youll ever see of me on the net....

hangnails & nail clippers

(<---ME back when xmas didnt make u want to eat glass and razor blades)

ppl think i swear a lot....but if they could hear the shit i say IN MY MIND on a daily basis they would know I actually hold back a lot.

i shopped after work today so i dont have to tomorrow, theyll just deliver it in the AM...i understand ppl who go mental and shoot up schools and post offices...cuz i would have liked nothing more than to shoot EVERY PERSON IN THRIFTYS....the slow old ladies...the budgers...the ppl who take 45 mins to look at a product when theres 30 ppl waiting to get by...
the idiot employees who stand there stunned when u ask them a seemingly simple question...
did i mention the slow old ladies?

FUCK

work was equally retarded...getting a straight answer out of anyone at head office is like pulling teeth...then i get the know it all staff thing going on in the mix...my staff is lucky they have eyes left today....i had to go for a walk b/c i was in serious rage mode...
i clearly have a rage issue...not that this is new to anyone who knows me but...u know....
timing is everything.
im so full of writhing, suffocating anger that I could....eat a whole jar of pickles....yeah....

My wee brother as of tomorrow will be gone 6 yrs...I think this is contributing to my mood...
weird some anniversaries im fine...seems weird this one is shaping into being a pissy one.
I bought a fancy set of candles to light up tomorrow...who knows...im so flighty i could wake up completely fine tomorrow...
so yeah dont call me....or write me asking how i am, thatll just piss me off....thanks though.

Maybe tomorrow ill finish lining my cupboards with that spongey liner crap....sounds like a mind-numbing activity in between the young and restless and peoples court.

tourettes of the mind

gawd....sometimes (ok most times) when im talking my logical brain voice is screaming for me to shut up...like today during the staff meeting i was like a tourettes case study and am unable to shut it off....
i am really a shit manager...im so fucking inappropriate it boggles even my tourette's ridden mind....
hahahah hahahah hahahaha and oddly enough i think my staff like me...they bring me Pirate Porn DVD's and when i tell them theyre getting shit b/c im getting shit they take that to be quite fair hahaha cuz u know shit flows down with gravity and all that so when it lands on my head i fling it around...

im going to bed early tonight...
carry on...

don't lose your head

i fell asleep with my glasses on watching henry rollin's SHOCK AND AWE dvd....i recall chuckling heartily in my bed under my blanket at him describing his own fashion of masturbatory delights...

then at some point ayla came in and turned off the dvd player (its hers and she was probably cursing me 4 it being left on cuz that wastes the *GOODNESS* of it)....

im having a staff meeting today...gawd help me if i lose my mind and cut everyones heads off.

untitled rage

omfg the last few days at work has licked the ass of a dead camel....
u know...those spells where no matter wtf you do its never good enough and the shit just keeps piling up and coming at u fr all directions...
i miss my prozac.

tonight i will be spending my night alone...so im gunna write a letter in bed and then watch a movie...something i already own and havent seen or something i just wanna see again...i will curl up in my fleece warm blanket and lv my window open just a crack so the air in my room in crisp but ill be warm under my blanket...i will put on my funky rainbow hanging lamp to create a mood b/c gawd knows when u are in bed by yourself watching a movie u need a mood created....

tonight i baked some chicken for dinner after work, and attempted to make some squash....gotta talk to the aunties again and find out how u make it so its not like runny ass baby food...tasted fine but i prefer it a little more SOLID.

ayla saw the Grudge 2 last night with her friend and her mom...now this is quite a step for young ayla whos about as chicken shit of scary movies as u can get....shes over it now obviously...
MUHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA yay!

douche bag mofo doctors

ok - all i can say is not i really dunno wtf is wrong with my neck b/c now they say its not my neck at all its muscular and i need the opposite of what i was told b4 but if theyre wrong and the 1st assumption was right and ido what they think i should now its wrong for what they thought 1st and i could really fuck myself and not in a good way sooooooooooooooooooo...(did u get all that?)...im saying FUCK EM ALL and im staying on anti inflam. meds until the day they rot my stomach lining or I die.
The End

on to other rivetting news....ayla played the heart strings of her beloved aunty pam and got herself the jacket of her dreams...im waiting for it to change her life any day now...
yay 4 aunty pam! now ayla wont die of pneumonia this winter!

ayla was invited to go to vancouver this weekend to visit ashley with A & T so i think shes going with her mini wad of cash and will surely have a BLAST...then will come home and tell me we have to move to vancouver next week bc they have all the best shopping there.

ayla says we have NO food...shes starving to death...
sure we havent shopped in ages and could use some fresh veggie & bread and milk etc but...gawd we have more food NOW with NONE than a lotta ppl have after shopping hahaha
she is such a spoiled product of society....more more more

we wont talk about the 4 kg of boneless skinless chicken breast in the freezer or all the other food that just requires some PREPARATION.

yeah no food....pffft

tonight Adrienne bought the raconteurs cd so i ripped it to my computer b4 she went home and i am digging it....although i admit in my head i call them the racoons...
my tea kick is still in full effect...
im drinking a lot of tea these days....its making me feel warm n fuzzy with the weather change i guess...
ok im really liking the racoon cd....maybe its the tea talking....

kori is coming down for a wedding on friday so ill get a short visit in with him friday night i think....
the englishman invited himself over tomorrow night...this is UNLIKE him...*PLANNING* something ahead of time...how bizarre! He said he may permit me to molest him as well...thursday is looking up despite the fact im doing an audit at another store tomorrow...

ive decided to make xmas cards this year...homemade jen weirdo xmas cards...and thats IT! im sending a goodie box to aunty cathy and sister kim and thats all...I feel liberated and FREE!
im gunna make "INTERESTING" jen xmas cards....so as some of u know from xmas past that means theyll be grossly inappropriate and blasphemous...if u want one u better email me yer mailing address....

this is excellent....

anti-porn propaganda....
thanks Guy!

Perversion for Profit

the daily rant

what is it with this city...? getting a Dr. is a fucking nightmare...yeah im a little picky, im pretty spoiled with my other Dr. from powell river but gimme a break. Apparently to get a Dr in Victoria you must be the following:

-over 55 or dieing
-pregnant
-willing to have a Dr whos old and crusty
-willing to have a boy Dr
-willing to have a Dr who doesnt speak the best english (and that is not a good thing as communication with a Dr is imperitive in my opinion)

Is it so fucking much to ask for female Dr who doesnt require a 9 hr train ride to powell river?
I cant stand this city 4 this shit...so fuck it im sticking to the walk-in numb nut brown bad english speaking bastards who are dismissive and useless.
I actually broke down and did call one male Dr that wasnt too far away here...I was informed the initial meeting was a MEET N GREET...and then it would be decided if he would take me on as a patient....Ummmm.....do I have to write an exam too? What if he thinks im too fat and doesnt wanna treat me? I'd burn his fucking office down....wtf is that shit...hoytee fucks make too much gawd damn money around here if they can pick and choose like that...then as it turns out bc i didnt have a medical card (i have the #) id have to pay cash up front....CASH UP FRONT FOR WHAT?!?!?! to get told im possibly NOT GOOD ENOUGH to fucking be taken as a patient....?
fuck u all u rich hoytee pieces of shit.
OK....im alright now.

turkey pepperoni is fuckin nastttty

dont buy it, ever.
barf

RESCUE ME is on shortly...
im gunna drink tea and eat popcorn to Dennis Leary swearing and banging....
then im gunna email a little...then im gunna watch my finger twitch.... its really fucking going hardcore hahahhaa the same finger that was numb is now twitching...and not just flickering...its twitching so hard it can type by itself - NO SHIT....i was grossing ayla out earlier... its quite funny to watch...better than the numbness...I guess tomorrow ill have to go to that damn walk in clinic and get some meds...i cant wait any longer 4 my other Dr to call the Rx in...last thing i need is my whole hand going hairy canary and flapping all over the place.

Best Media Statement of the Week

Willie Nelson's public statement regarding being caught with a bag of Marijuana earlier this week:

"It's a good thing I had a bag of Marijuana instead of a bag of spinach. I'd be dead by now."

cross-eyed tea drinker

that's me baby!

michelle and I were talking earlier....about liars...and grey pubes....vulnerability/self preservation...very well rounded conversation....by the way the grey pube thing really messes her up... { AUTHOR INSERTING A BREAK IN THE SENTENCE HERE B/C IT APPEARS I WANT HER TO VISIT WITH HER CAMERA TO TAKE PICS OF GREY PUBES OTHERWISE...} michelle...hurry up and visit...bring yer camera...and just hang out with jen for a weekend! can u imagine the conversation....?!!!!!!! wooohooo besides I need to prove to you that im fat...

we are out of milk til friday so I searched the cupboard 4 some emergency canned milk for tea....thank gawd...I wasnt looking 4ward to trying the french vanilla coffee creamer in the fridge to dazzle up my tea....

ok i just got real tired all the sudden and feel like i have narcolepsy......good night!

maddie's mom tried to wash her in the pretend washing machine...

...but maddie escaped!
I love this picture...its nice and whacky.

im grooving to alice in chains...
i love 90's grunge (i know, gag me with the labels already)...i will always love it...

its funny b/c my friend Guy grew up in washington state and knew all the grunge guys and thinks they were all a buncha fucking asshole losers...that tends to happen when u get to know them...which is why i usually prefer to not know them...its my little bubble of denial.
have i ever mentioned Guy is the smartest person I know...seriously.

i got schooled today by my boss....
turns out the district was split in 2 recently and this means my boss has more time to spend with us victoria managers so im planning on milking that 4 all its worth so i can stop being a lame fucktard at work...
i look fwd to eventually being transfered to store where i wasnt once equals with the staff...this makes for a very weird dynamic in a store...when your peer is suddenly your manager...i dont recommend it.

ok im listening to pearl jam now...ohhh eddie whyd u go marry a super model...sheesh...thats so gay.
i get to sleep in a bit tomorrow...yay 4 jen!

mmmmm i love the bubbles

i'd strangle a midget right now for a giant pepsi.... off to work i go...
i think today is gunna be a freakshow....
i have the itchiest back ever and will walk around work carrying my bamboo back scratcher, scaring all the staff...
donna isnt at work today...so i have no reason to live really....sighhhh...

today seems like a good day to be high....

cousin kelly's backyard visitor....

ok that sounded dirty.....